


Story Time

by Squiddly



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Curses, F/M, Love, Story within a Story, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-09
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-04-03 15:51:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 30,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4106479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Squiddly/pseuds/Squiddly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zeref has been cut off from all of his magic and sentenced to an eternity of confinement for his crimes, rather than the gift of death he wanted so badly. To pass the time, he tells Natsu an old story. A story that no one else could know about the infamous mage. The story of how he once stole a princess and started a war.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Mage and the Princess

"Let me tell you a story, Natsu."

Those were the first words Zeref had spoken to Natsu since he was sentenced to infinite confinement. The permanent severing of his magic was what seemed to finally calm him completely. Surprisingly (not) Natsu was extremely impatient with his newfound psychotic, macabre fixated brother. Lucy was the one to tell him he had to wait it out. Let Zeref find the right words in his own time. The only reason the mass murderer was alive was because Natsu was able to argue that death would be a reward to Zeref, rather than a punishment.

It took two years, three months, and twelve days. Natsu hadn't waited that long for something in his whole life and all he got was 7 words. A total of 7 words that Zeref didn't elaborate on for another day because their ten minutes of visitation were up. Natsu thought he even saw a smile on Zeref's face when the guards came.

After a restless day and night, Natsu returned. Zeref was still in the same spot, bound with magic binding metal shackles. He was dressed in a loose white shirt and pants in a chair with more shackles around his elbows, wrists, waist, and ankles. This wasn't how he always looked, just when he had visitors.

The black haired man lifted his face enough to give a weak smile, as he did before each visit. But that was usually all Natsu had the chance to see. The moment those doors were shut, all light was gone from the cell. The only place there was even a modicum of light was just below the air vent above Zeref's head. It gave only a vague idea of the expressions on his face. For someone like Natsu, it was extremely unnerving.

"So, you have a story for me?" Natsu plopped down into his typical spot right before his vastly different looking brother.

Natsu had a hard time believing that Zeref was really his brother at first. The idea that someone so evil could be his relative shot him through the heart. It made him curious about all kinds of things he didn't usually worry about. Like, why did Zeref do the things he did? Were the deaths and atrocities he committed at all redeemable because he couldn't control it? Was he capable of the same kind of evil destruction?

"I do." Zeref's soft voice entered the darkness. "But it isn't the story you want to hear."

Natsu wanted to choke this guy. He was so vague about everything. Why couldn't he just be straight forward and tell him everything all in one shot?

"You're angry. That's understandable." He continued. "Nothing will quell that feeling. Don't hold onto it for too long or you could end up hurting someone you love." His already muted voice faded, the meaning of those words was left just as vague.

"I don't care what you tell me, just say somethin'. I'm done waiting to hear you out, Lucy's the only reason I haven't already kicked the crap out of you." Natsu's fists tightened, remembering her angry frown when he suggested that method of interrogation. She was a little more understanding than Natsu.

Zeref sighed. He knew this wouldn't be easy. It would be one of the hardest things he ever did in his very, extremely long life. But someone had to know, and if there was anyone he trusted with this information it was Natsu. He and Mavis were the only ones Zeref could speak to on this matter. Natsu would torch him for holding back his own story. But this had been sitting inside of him for so long that it needed to be let it out. No more darkness and death, Zeref was far beyond that. His mind now steadied itself on his sickening immortality and the lives he needlessly ended.

Natsu lit a small flame and placed it between them so he could see better. Zeref's eyes squinted closed, unused to seeing light anymore.

The pink haired man folded his arms. "You gonna talk, or what?"

Zeref smiled and looked away from Natsu, the darkness behind his brother was far better suited for these particular memories.

"Once, many centuries ago, an evil mage stole a princess..."

...

It was dark in those days. Zeref had all but killed every last person he knew. Ten years passed in a struggle, everything would age and die except for him. He split his time between working on new magical theories and sleeping. During his intense research he came across an interesting topic.

There was a group of monarchs in a distant country that were unaffected by magic. Physical harm would not come to them in the face of its effects. They were said to be blessed as opposed to Zeref's own awful curse. Perhaps they were his antithesis, perhaps they would know how to end his suffering.

Wandering about distant green forests, Zeref found himself lost and lonely.

There was a distinct difference between being alone and feeling lonely. Being alone was important to keep ones thoughts in order. It was ideal for research and meditation. Being lonely was a dark feeling that accompanied rejection from others. Against what many would want to believe, Zeref was a social person. He preferred the company of others. He yearned for acceptance and kindness. He respected life and the happiness it brought with it. Being lost in that forest for some time brought him to that understanding.

One morning he woke in a mossy ravine to the touch of a young lady, her hand pressed to his heart, searching for a pulse. He was surprised she wasn't repelled by the touch of his flesh like every other living thing. She was younger than himself in appearance. Perhaps 16 or 17. She let out a soft gasp when his eyes opened, relieved to find him alive. He hadn't seen relief for his sake in a long time. Soft, heather grey eyes watched as he unfurled from the ungodly position he'd been sleeping.

"Are you alright? You didn't appear to be breathing, sorry if I made you uncomfortable." She apologized with a slight bow to her head and a sheepish grin. "I'm Vala."

...

"...I didn't know that I'd just met the person who would ruin everything I'd researched up to that point." Zeref clarified quietly to a very serious looking Natsu. The memory of her face wracked the black mage. Something about those dead grey eyes staring blankly up at him he would never forget.

When he didn't continue the story, Natsu gave a grumpy face, "that's it? That's all I get after 2 years? What kinda bullshit is that!"

The ghost of a smile flashed over Zeref's expression, but like any apparition it was gone before anyone could see. "No, there's more. Our time is up for the day, and I would hate to be interrupted."

Just then the guards began tapping at the door. Natsu got up, reluctantly, casting disappointed glares at Zeref.

Honestly Zeref reveled in Natsu's anger, it meant that he felt something. Without another word, Natsu left, taking his light with him.

The days and nights faded into one another. In solitary confinement this was especially true. Zeref felt his heavy shackles, they appeared heavier each day. He used to pace and dream, but now he could barely lift himself from his spot on the wall. Most of the day he was allowed to walk and move about the cell so long as his shackles were in place. The only time Natsu was allowed to visit was when he was fully bound with magic resistant metal. No one else was granted permission to be in the same room at the great black wizard. Zeref rocked his head back against the wall.

Was it so wrong to wish for death? After all of these years, after so much death. Natsu, Mavis… Vala… Zeref's eyes clenched shut to silence the sharp, crushing pain in his heart. Even thinking that woman's name hurt. Losing Natsu had hurt as a child, as had losing Mavis, but there weren't words that one could use to express what Vala's shortened life did. The words fell somewhere on the gradient between something as tame as devastation and gentle a term as soul-crushing.

Cold tears rimmed his eyes just thinking of it. He had, by his own hands, killed so many people. Scholars, doctors, children, men, women, animals... He had taken their lives and there was no way to control any of it.

The only thing that helped to relieve the pain was hearing Natsu's voice. It helped when he visited each day. Even when Zeref was not speaking, Natsu couldn't stop. He learned that his younger brother was living with a young woman and that he was in love with her, even if he had not come to that conclusion yet. He knew that Natsu was taking missions, but he only discussed them when something truly drastic happened.

There was a light knock on the door before he was blinded by Natsu's arrival. He had seen the glassy look in his chained brother's eyes. He knew better than to ask what made him so upset, anyone would feel upset with Zeref's lot in life. He didn't make any remarks; he only set tiny fire aflame between them and furrowed his brow. Waiting.

Zeref took command of his voice and continued his tale, "Most days I considered myself the devil. But the day I met Vala everything shifted..."

...

Vala came across Zeref by accident. She had been picking flowers for her younger sister who decided to wander off. She thought he was hurt at first, and placed her hand over his heart. She could feel it pump slowly. He wore old clothes and looked at if he hadn't eaten in days. She wondered if he was trying to die. The city was a mere mile away, he could have easily gone there to feed himself. She sat back on her haunches and watched his face for a short time.

He didn't move when he woke. The young lady held one hand over his chest, feeling his heartbeat. It was a wonder that she did not shrivel up and die in the moment, so he spent the time she hovered over him wondering what was protecting her. When she moved away, he finally opened his eyes.

Her heart smiled when he opened his eyes. She thought he was a goner for a minute there. "Are you alright? Sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I'm Vala."

Was he alright...? What a loaded question. He wasn't sure how to answer truthfully so he just watched her eyes. She seemed to understand to some small extent. Her small hand went to touch him again and he couldn't help but flinch and shuffle out of her reach. Her hand floated in the empty space, both worried and curious. She shuffled closer again and Zeref held up a hand to stop her, "Please don't touch me."

A light blush warmed her cheeks as she muffled a giggle and a soft smile, "sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable again. You have a leaf in your hair." She sat back to take in the summer sunshine. "If you need anything please go due south for one mile. There's an old abandoned temple there, if you're afraid of being touched then the city might not be the best option. If you go there, I can take care of you."

Zeref brushed the leaves from his hair with a sheepish smile. In exchange for her help, the black wizard helped the young lady find her young sister. Her name was Orie and she was maybe five years old. Seeing them hug and exchange affectionate banter made Zeref unconsciously appreciate what life had given them. The way Vala admonished her grinning sister for wandering off reminded him of a rambunctious pink haired boy he once knew. That wonderful feeling of warmth was quickly smothered by a deep aching pain in his head. He knew it was coming.

"R-run!" He threw one arm toward Vala and her sister. She took a hold of her young sister and did not spare Zeref another glance before heeding his warning.

The wave came on fast and hard, utterly decaying everything within a 20 meter radius. He sunk to his knees as the wave passed, wishing more than ever that death would just take him. Why was it that any time he came close to friendship this curse had to rip it away from him? Why couldn't he just be normal? He curled in on himself, hating every fiber of his own existence. That is, until a gentle hand fell lightly over his shoulder.

Zeref unconsciously flinched away, turning to see who was insane enough to touch the devil.

A pretty young woman with light brown hair and grey eyes looked over him for harm. How could he expect her to understand the danger of his proximity?

"When that happens, is there pain associated with the expulsion of death or do you black out when it is released from your body?" Vala asked, her sweet voice taking on a clinical edge.

Was she trying to study him? He had done enough research on himself but he did not know how to answer that question.

She circled him, brown riding boots crunching the forest floor from beneath her yellow neck high sundress. "Thank you for the warning, I don't understand much of magic. This," her hand splayed out to point out the destruction surrounding them, "is highly unusual, I'm guessing?"

Zeref's gaze dropped to the ground, "you should stay away from me, I will only cause your death."

"No you won't." Zeref's eyes lifted at the girl's strange words as she crouched before him with a bright smile, taking ahold of his hand before he could retract. Vala smiled even more deeply, "You can't hurt me."

...

"I was right, I would cause her death." Zeref felt his voice attempting to tighten and he paused. Natsu appeared disappointed at his halted speech, his interest renewed when Zeref continued. "She had a secret place in the woods, and old abandoned temple older than time. To my surprise, Vala was also right. I couldn't hurt her. She could freely touch my skin without fear. I was determined to figure out why."

 


	2. Curiosity Killed the Suitor

Each day for nearly two months Vala brought Zeref simple necessities to a mossy stone temple. The structure looked as if it grew out of the surrounding forest with large arching windows and doorways with no doors or panes of glass. His search for the untouchable royals was momentarily halted in favor of researching the pretty topic that stood right before him. He was convinced that Vala was somehow related to them. By some stroke of luck Vala was just as interested in Zeref's unholy magic as he was in her strange ability to survive his curse.

"How old were you when this started?" Vala's eyes were wide as she watched ancient vines wither and die, crumbling right before her eyes during one of Zeref's 'fits' as she had come to call them.

Holding his aching head, Zeref felt him come back into himself. It was surprising each and every time he saw her still breathing. She was the only person he'd ever met who was immune to his evil curse. He didn't answer her question, he was afraid to tell her that he was immortal. He'd been judged enough by people he didn't care for. For someone he truly liked to reject him would be beyond painful.

She didn't take his silence as a negative, she wrote something in her swirling handwriting into a worn leather notebook. Hers was so different from his own. His handwriting was not scrawl, but it also was not neat by any stretch.

When she left that day, Zeref felt a foreign sense of loneliness. He'd experienced a number of different kinds of loneliness. But this one sunk into his bones, forcing him to listen to the sound of her absence. To deflect the feeling, he dove headlong into some books she had left for him to peruse. They were regarding the war history of the area and it explained why the kingdom rejected magic.

Evidently there was a war between three kingdoms, including Vala's, where magic was used as a weapon. Only one of the warring countries was awarded this benefit. That kingdom dominated the battlefield, taking innumerous lives and causing an even larger number of casualties and deformities. The other two kingdoms joined forces only long enough to batter down the magic empire they fought. But that was where the ancient text moved away from reality, delving further into myth than anything.

According to legend, one particularly powerful wizard fell in love with a local girl who was taken as a prisoner of war. To keep her safe he transferred all of his power into a rare curse preventing a single individual from harm. Little did this wizard know, the woman he loved so dearly was pregnant as a result of their dalliance. He had unknowingly cast the spell on his own child, blessing him with the same ward of protection. This child grew up and became the commander of the non-magical kingdom without ever learning his true parentage, his victory earned him knighthood. From there, this guarded lineage spread and eventually grew diluted. The area was well known for its healers and medicines because their people were immune to most deadly diseases.

There were other passages that suggested that the knight married the princess of the other non-magical kingdom. It went further to suggest that the lineage was still prevalent to that day. Perhaps suggesting that Vala was of that bloodline.

In the chilled, crisp air of autumn, Zeref had fallen asleep at his desk scattered with papers and hand written notes. He woke next to a lit oil lamp, his shoulders covered by several blankets with a note under his hand. The handwriting was elegant and swirling in an artistic way.

_Z-_

_Sorry, I can't make it to you again until morning. Stay warm._

_-V_

An apple sat next to the note. An unconscious smile smoothed over his lips at her concern. Zeref was used to being completely alone, so being cared for was an entirely new feeling. Vala's doting personality was incredibly endearing. Still bleary eyed he passed his way over to the room he'd set up with a futon and a few other small items. Papers and charts were stuck to every available surface to inspire him further.

Without grace he fell into the bed and took her advice by bundling up. It was cold and she had left plenty of thick down blankets. They smelled like her. He hadn't really considered what that smell was until that very moment. It was what he imagined a home might smell like. There was a lingering scent of crackling fire and spiced rum with just a small, overarching scent of lavender. He nestled himself into the warm embrace of that sillage and imagined what her life must be like beyond these stone walls. From their brief conversations he gathered a few small facts.

Vala had a younger sister named Orie, seven nameless brothers, two parents and a field of hunting dogs. She wasn't allowed to practice magic, so she found use of her talents in the arts. She could draw and sing, but could not read sheet music. He only knew this from watching her during the short time they spent together each day. She would sing light, airy songs with words he didn't know, the kind of music one might expect to be accompanied by softly whistling flutes. There were small pictures in her notes that he once commented on while he read them over. She wasn't happy about his running commentary on her artistic skills. Especially not when he found a drawing she created of him.

An unconscious smile pulled at his lips. They did that from time to time. He would read her notes about him, and she would read his notes about her. She was pretty close to the truth, or, at least, as close as he'd ever gotten. She theorized that he was cursed by an angry God. Another theory was that he had a buildup of some chemical that needed to be released from time to time or else he would die. Luckily for him, Vala couldn't understand half of what he wrote due to her very limited knowledge of magic. Aside from that, Zeref knew that Vala spoke another language aside from the one they communicated. A soft accent accompanied her voice in his native tongue.

Zeref ran his fingers along the roughened silk of the blanket, feeling ridges where goose feathers wanted to push through. He imagined she must be well off to have the luxury of donating something so fine to a stranger.

A life filled with finery would never give Zeref relief. What finally pulled him down into a calm restful sleep was the thought of caring for someone like Vala. Being cared for and the act of caring for another person were two separate concepts. A person who longs to be cared for is a person who is stoic to another's needs. To care for another shows what words cannot describe. Vala was not dim, she was quite the opposite. She tried hard to understand him and why his magic behaved as it did. Her diligence in her care of him told far more than if she were to tell him outright. She was interested in the world and its tumultuous nature, Zeref included. Zeref wanted nothing more than to make her happy. He wanted her to find what she was looking for in him. It was amazing each and every time she touched him (though against his will) how she would brighten and her eyes would sparkle. Images such as these were a lullaby, dreams of warm embraces and her stately fragrance easily pulled him under until the sun rose once more.

The sun's light was a line on the horizon, fading the dark sky until it was a gradient of pink and yellow, slowly waking Zeref. He woke to a sound in the other room, where his latest papers resided. Before he could think, he was standing in a doorway watching Vala limp through the stone arch with a canvas bag filled with vegetables slung over one shoulder. Before she could say no, he took it from her.

The brown haired girl shot him a dissatisfied glare, "I'm perfectly capable of carrying that on my own." She mumbled but her words fell on deaf ears.

"Why are you limping?" Zeref attempted to appear subtle in his questioning, but failed miserably. His voice was higher and louder than he intended.

Vala's brow raised a few millimeters with a smile. "I fell off of a horse that I've been training. As previously stated, I am perfectly capable of tending to myself."

The dark Mage watched her wearily, measuring the small distance between them with his eyes, and not quite believing her tale. "Am I allowed to worry for your general well being?"

So few words were ever exchanged between them to that point that what she said next radiated down Zeref's spine and coiled a system of nerves in his stomach.

Grey eyes glinted with mischief she smiled low and sweet, momentarily hexing the devil incarnate. Something so simple as a smile from her was more than enough to lull the beast inside and send his heart pounding. Vala drifted close; close enough for Zeref to feel the warm air around her body. He knew he should warn her once more about his curse, but the words fell to the hollow of his throat as he swallowed nervously.

Soft fingertips grazed the back of his hand as she coaxed the bag out of his grip, leaving so little space between them it should have been a crime. Warm breath touched his lips and his heart choked. Then, when he was sufficiently pliable with her fingers curled gingerly over his did she quietly breathe into the small space between them, "Only when you look at me like that."

Cognizant thought returned when her warm hand slid from his and she disappeared into the morning haze.

...

"--so your curse didn't affect her? Was she one of those royal people you were after?" Natsu asked, hands braced to his knees, leaning as far foreword as possible. Zeref breathed a laugh. He was shocked that Natsu was interested in this at all.

"I will tell you more another time, you only have a little time remaining."

"But..." Natsu rocked back, eyes wide as a dejected child. "When you're not telling the story then you just stop talking."

Warmth flooded the black Mage. Natsu just wanted to hear his brother's voice, he wanted answers that Zeref was yet to give. To ease the unhappy look in Natsu's eye, Zeref obliged with an inconsequential short story, a shoot off from the main narrative.

"One night she came to me with tears in her eyes..."

...

Sympathy wasn't something Zeref ever doled out easily. But one day in the thick of winter, Vala's reddened eyes and the way she hid them made his black heart ache for her.

"Here are a few books I found on your research topic." Her voice was fragile as she spoke, small clouds of winter air puffed from pale lips, "I thought you might want them. They're illegal within the city's walls."

"Why?" He asked, sliding his fingers over the ancient texts to take them from her grip. His question was more directed toward her paled features than the books she so kindly brought him.

"My father forbade magic in his kingdom many years ago, right after the war. He fears what he does not understand." Light grey eyes fell from Zeref's black ones shyly. "I want to ask something of you, I'm afraid you'll say no." She took a slow breath and swallowed her nerves before looking back up to him. "Please teach me how to use magic."

"If you've gone this long without its use, why would you need it now?" asked the bewildered Mage.

"I need to learn how to protect myself."

Zeref didn't like the way she said that accompanied with her tear clumped lashes and quiet voice. This particular girl was not terribly quiet, definitely not when she wanted to ask something of him. It was unnerving. Vala was quick to realize he needed answers before he'd be convinced. "My eldest brother ascended the throne a few months back, a few weeks after you and I met." Zeref's face fell, suddenly realizing that Vala's family was not just wealthy— they were royalty. The princess pulled the shawl tighter over her shoulders, eyes downcast and far darker than Zeref had ever seen. "He wishes to marry me off to some foreign prince in exchange for a war treaty." Her red-rimmed eyes fell closed so she wouldn't have to see the strange look in Zeref's tightening black eyes. "I should have told you my lineage sooner. It has been pleasant bring near someone who cares so little about my status."

Zeref's theory was solidified. Vala was related to the untouchable bloodline.

If his theories were correct then he could not teach her magic. If he did, she might disrupt the magic that prevented her from being harmed. She might accidentally learn to reject her natural gift. If she did that, then he would certainly become her killer. That was simply not a risk he was willing to take.

"I'm sorry Vala, but I cannot teach you. One cannot learn magic at your age." He lied. He watched the light leave her eyes.

"Oh..."

"Why do you need protection from your suitor? What would magic do to help your situation?" He felt the words leave before he could process their implication. It was obvious why she might need protection from a warring country's prince. His fists tightened at his sides.

A pretty blush came over her cheeks, "Not long ago I lied to you about being kicked by my horse. Rather, this particular suitor is from an area of the world where women are fully subservient. He doesn't like my propensity for curiosity and felt obligated to correct my behavior. I couldn't see you that night because I had to spend the night with a healer."

Vala's explanation filled Zeref with an unhealthy dose of anger. He wanted to kill anyone who would dare harm someone so important to him as Vala.

"What is his name?" He asked, somehow managing to keep a hold on his fury.

Vala's lips pulled into a hapless smile, her eyes dancing with amusement, "What good could his name possibly do?"

"You have in your service one of the world's most dangerous weapons." Zeref held out his hands, eyes a blood red color that she had only seen when he had his so-called fits. She had never seen him quite so irate, she didn't even know that he could actually control his violent magic. "Nothing would give me greater pleasure than to rid you of this problem."

Eyes wide and sweet, her lips parted as if to speak then fell closed into a soft, weary smile. "You would kill for my sake?"

He didn't have to answer. His body language told her enough. Sliding closer, she must have felt his heavy stare on her. She came close, closer than ever, even closer than the few months prior when she captured him so thoroughly before disappearing into the morning light. So close that her hands slid up his chest to the back of his neck to gently grip a handful of unkempt black hair. His heart raged in his chest, still furious that someone would damage his friend. She did not shy from his blood red eyes, rather, she appeared transfixed by them.

Up to that point, Zeref had never been kissed. He had never put much thought into the opposite sex. He never had the time to think about such things, research had always taken priority. The power of such a soft touch was far more potent than he imagined. Vala pulled him low enough to gently touch his lips with her own. Every shred of hate and anger fell through his feet, leaving his arms weak and limp at his sides—

...

A heavy knock broke Zeref from his story, and Natsu from his concentration. Guards suddenly flooded the room.

"Natsu! We've been waiting. Time's up!" One large man proclaimed.

Zeref scowled. He really did hate to be interrupted. Though he couldn't help but be glad they interrupted that particular part of that particular story. He wasn't ashamed, but it was definitely a bit more personal than he wanted to discuss with his enthralled little brother.

Before Natsu got up, he asked with his eyes still a little wide from shock, "did you kill that guy? What was it like when she kissed you?"

Zeref was surprised by his interest, but he left it on a cliffhanger and smiled. "Perhaps you will find out tomorrow."

The door closed with a metallic bang. He didn't particularly want to continue telling that part of the story. There was a far more important part that he needed to get off of his aching chest.

* * *


	3. A Necessary Confrontation

The following day, Zeref got right into his tale without even the slightest greeting. He was determined to get this all out in one sitting, though it seemed a bit unlikely.

He dreamed the night before for the first time in ages. He dreamed of a pretty face next to his in a bed that they shared, giving a broad toothy grin as she admired his lengthened canines. A soft touch to his cheek, and a kiss to his lips. It was a memory of the night he told her that he was immortal, that he'd killed everyone at his academy and why he was really researching her family. He had expected her hatred, or some kind of negative reaction to his suicidal thoughts. But instead she cupped his cheek and kissed him, nestling into the crook of his arm as they watched the sun go down.

This should have been a kind dream, but it felt more like a nightmare. One that he could never outrun. So he did what he could by telling Natsu Vala's tale.

...

Zeref had finally discovered the name of her family's 'blessing' after another two months of tearing apart the books Vala brought to him. It was known as Guardian Magic, it was an old magic that the members of her family did not even realize they were using. Even the young woman seated in the old, crumbling stone window could not comprehend the concept. He didn't even realize that his research had entirely shifted from bringing back the dead to keeping one person alive forever. All he could ever want was right there seated across the room, writing something quietly in her notebook as she hummed some nameless tune.

Lately Vala was begging him to teach her how to access her hidden magic. But now, even more than before, he could not. Although accessing her magic could potentially give her the same immortality as he had, it could also kill her. If there was even a small break in her protective shield, she could succumb to Zeref's cursed wave of death. The other options were nearly as horrifying. There were few things that made Zeref more upset than to imagine Vala married to a man who had the capacity to harm her.

"He did that." she spoke quietly as he ran his thumb over her bare shoulder. The sun was growing hotter, and Vala's dresses were growing more and more bold, showing more and more of her sun kissed skin. In other news, the plant life was more plentiful around their secret temple. Not that any of those unfortunate plants survived long.

"Tell me his name, Vala." Zeref hated the bruises he was seeing more and more frequently. It only meant that she was seeing that same suitor more and more. Physically, the closer they became, the more dark violet marks he found. Her courtier would hurt her whenever she was forced to spend time with him. But she didn't want to give up the prince's name in fear that his sudden death might start another war. Zeref was smart enough to know she was right, but that didn't make it any easier.

Zeref woke one morning in the middle of summer to her soft lips on his neck. Then his chest, his chin, jaw, under his eyes...

Pulse racing, Zeref's mouth quickly found hers. Gentle kisses melded into something deeper, her tongue would run across his sharp canines before taking his lower lip between her own. It wasn't the first time they'd ended up entangled with one another like this. Typically they saved it for the night, neither of them was experienced in such a way. The darkness made it easier to touch one another without the nerves that accompanied it.

But her grey eyes were dark that morning. Haunted. Zeref ran his hands down her sides, onto her thighs as he pulled her hem higher. Softer, smaller hands pulled at the front of his long black collar, attempting to pull it free. She did manage to pull the knot over his left shoulder loose enough to drape over the edge of his bed. Warm lips met the corner of his mouth and pushed him to his back, straddling his hips with that same darkened gaze. His hands slid up her thighs, pulling the thin yellow sundress up with them.

That was when he saw the marks. Dark with crescents of dried blood, five of them on either thigh where someone had attempted to force themselves onto her.

The next thing he knew, Vala was pinned below him; her hands pressed hard at his chest, pushing him away. Eyes wide with shock, but not fear. Shaken, Zeref sat back, throat dry as the desert, unsure of what just happened. Face red with embarrassment and something else, Vala pulled herself up until she was seated across from him on his bed, legs folded under her hips. She looked to be on the very edge of fear, and that was something Zeref never wanted her to feel in his presence.

"I- I'm sorry." he stuttered, eyes wide and frightened, like a rabbit at the end of a rifle. "I don't know what happened, I just-"

"Shh." Vala silenced him with a finger to his lips, eyes still lowered away from his. "It's okay. I know better than to surprise you like that." Black eyes lowered as well, looking at the bruises on her exposed thighs. Someone had gripped her hard enough to burst a few small capillaries. And he managed to make things worse by reacting the way he had.

To preempt his obvious question, she explained vaguely, "I rejected his proposal. I told him that I belonged to someone else. He didn't take the news well." Smiling, she took his hand and held it firmly, still unable to look at him as some terrifying memory flashed over her expression. "I didn't want to feel him on my skin, so I came here."

"You can tell me." Zeref started to say, but his voice dried up halfway. He couldn't think of the right way to phrase what he wanted to say. "If he..." he paused again. "You can tell me anything."

Vala looked up at him shyly from below dark eyelashes and a few strands of messy auburn hair. "nothing like... _that_ happened. All I could think was how much I wanted you with me, and how badly I wanted to hurt him for touching me."

There was the smallest glimmer of a question behind her eyes. Zeref already knew what she wanted to ask, but he still couldn't agree. He still refused to teach her to use magic, especially not dark magic. It might have been selfish to feel that way, but he couldn't let her become his experiment and die, nor could he let her end up with a creature so foul as the one who left those bruises.

 _"Come away with me, then!"_ she would argue, _"We could disappear into the mist and no one would ever find us. I could learn magic for a time, far away, so you wouldn't have to worry. We could meet again when my training was complete. Please, I can't keep playing this game."_

But her arguments always fell short. Zeref couldn't justify bringing her away from her home and into a world of magic without knowing for sure what would happen once she could access it. In theory it should have allowed her to push the protective ward inward, removing her ability to age. In practice, it could very well do nothing and she would age and die just like everyone else. Either that, or Zeref could accidentally kill her. There were simply too many variables and he was not going to play with her life.

Never before had Zeref met someone to capture him like this. He was more than happy to wear her shackles; to kiss and hold her and to let himself speak freely in her presence. He could actually hold her life as precious because she was in no danger of his hellish waves of death. But it seemed no matter how badly he wanted her to know these feelings, he could still feel her slipping away. She would see him twice each day, but they wouldn't talk and exchange notes like they had before. He constantly feared that she had realized that he was not right for her. That she should fear and loathe him for what he was. That there was someone else waiting for his princess at that castle in the distance.

This fears finally came to a fruition early one late summer morning.

"Can you sit with me?" The auburn haired girl smiled up at him from her usual spot in the window's arch, but the moment she spoke he knew her smile was a lie. Her bright grin faltered when Zeref did not move, instead opting to observe the way the pale morning light seemed to caress her every fiber. Vala really was beautiful.

When he made it apparent that he wasn't coming any closer, Vala bit her lip and began speaking quickly. Nerves showed through the glassy surface of her silver eyes as she spoke, "My brother set a date for the wedding without my permission. I denied the prince's proposal, but the king went ahead with the plans as if I had agreed anyway." Her heart felt like it was physically breaking at those words. "Now we are out of time. There is no way to get out of it unless I leave here forever." Sadness overwhelmed her features, begging her dark mage to say the right words. "If we don't disappear from this place together, then I'm afraid I cannot continue seeing you. There are a number of things I'm not proud of, but I'm certainly not that kind of woman."

That stone window appeared to dim at her words. Zeref felt his world fall and crack. Zeref had seen the bruises. He'd seen the way she would shrivel up and hide her face when she was forced to spend time with her prince. He had seen the way she had begun to flinch away from his touch, as if she was afraid.

Zeref was never one for confrontation, but he needed to make himself plainly clear. She couldn't marry that man, but she also couldn't come with him when he inevitably left. It was for her own safety—

...

"—Wait. So you _didn't_ kill that guy?" Natsu interrupted, dumbfounded. "Damn, even I'd have a hard time holding back if someone ever hurt…" his voice trailed, not ready to admit those feelings to anyone quite yet.

Zeref sighed deeply with a worn smile. "You'll never find out if you keep interrupting." Natsu rolled his eyes and Zeref continued, "She fought with me, trying to make me see the terrible mistake I was making, and when she couldn't take anymore she began to walk away. But not before pushing another knife into the wound…"

...

"You don't care for me at all, do you?" Vala's eyes narrowed over her shoulder as she turned away.

It hurt to hear her say that. Of course he did, but what would his affection achieve? More pain? More death? Admitting to his feelings would only make her suffer. It was… complicated. He couldn't just let her leave, and he couldn't simply let her come with him. Surely she couldn't continue seeing him now that she was betrothed, but it would be just as foolish to take a princess away from her kingdom just before her wedding. He knew enough about the kingdom's history that they were war-torn and desperate for a break of peace. Any wrong step could cause catastrophe. He watched the back of her head, willing her to turn around and… and… He wasn't sure what he wanted from her at that point. He just knew he wanted to be heard.

As if she'd sensed his inner panic, Vala stopped and turned on her heel, storm grey eyes ablaze. "Silence is an answer in itself, Zeref. If that's the case I might as well accept this proposal and get it over with." Those were her sharp final words as she turned to walk away for good. But that wasn't enough for the black mage.

Zeref's heart felt like it was doused in ice water, his limbs felt numb and cold. Those lips that had only ever touched his would be forever tainted by the violent man she would soon call her husband. She would have to give up her body and soul for him rather than the one she truly cared for. Something about that felt far worse than effectively kidnapping her.

"Look at me, Vala." He pleaded as he followed her steps, easily catching up to her with far longer strides. She refused to abide, opting to close her eyes and trudge along faster as tears fell into the light breeze.

Panic. Fear. Anger. They were all twisting and tearing at him. He felt her falling through his fingers. All he could see was Vala slowly decaying in his arms, or worse, being killed by her betrothed. Zeref wasn't sure he was brave enough to endure either option. But he knew for damn sure that he wasn't going to be able to decide without Vala's attention. Her eyes were still closed, lips pressed together as frustrated tears fell. He just wanted her to turn and see what she was doing to him. When his hand clasped her upper arm, he hadn't really intended to scare her. He hadn't really expected the way his darkness suddenly took over, either.

" **Look at me!** " A feral voice snarled from close behind. It wasn't a yell or a shout. It was a dark demand that Vala was honestly too afraid not to obey.

Tendrils of black flames dimmed all surrounding light, blocking out the sun until there was nothing but pure darkness. Only a pair of widening grey eyes remained, rising slowly to meet his.

Pounding heartbeats reverberated through the distance between them. She could feel each hard beat shake her body. Shuddering muscles and the glistening veneer of cold sweat. Blood red eyes still tight and commanding felt heavy on her fear softened gaze. She barely noticed the rough way his hand clutched her upper arm to keep her from running. But she felt it, aching painfully deep in her bones, threatening to crack under the unrelenting pressure of his grip. He could kill her so easily, and it took that very moment to truly grasp that important fact.

They never fought like this before. Never. Not even when he was torn up with feelings of failure. Not even when she tried to get a rise out of him about his lack of commitment. Calm, well thought out words were the way he preferred to argue. Zeref had never been one to truly fight with her. It wasn't fair because he knew she couldn't fight back. Every time she mentioned her courtship with that prince, Zeref wanted to break something, someone, namely the prince in question. Every time she came to him with bruises on her face... Somehow he'd even managed not to murder anyone the day she came with her arm in a sling or those small cuts on her thighs. Why was no one noticing these injuries? Why was her family ignoring her pain? The darkness grew crushingly thick, anyone else would have been nothing more than decayed matter, but not Vala.

"Is this what you want?" Her voice trembled delicately, unsure of this dark mage before her. Tears sprung to the very rim of her eyes, further tightening her soft voice, "My fear?"

Terror made her widened eyes glassy. They appeared like shallow puddles after a raging storm. His deep red, soul-splitting eyes slowly softened to match, fading back to their natural dark color. This was his answer. The girl under his grip released a quiet breath she hadn't known she was holding.

Zeref knew there would be marks on her from his rough treatment of her arm. Something about that filled him with both glee and horror. Some part of him truly wanted her fear, it wanted to feel her blood seep through his fingers. It wanted her new fiancé to see the marks he would leave on her sweet body when he ruined her for any other man who ever dared touch her. But a far larger part was strong enough to smother those terrible feelings. He was disgusted that he was even capable of conjuring thoughts so horrible.

Truly, he hated her fear. He hated to cause her pain and suffering. But what else could he ever be to her? He would only ever hurt her, as proven by the dark purple stains under his hand. He was the monster hiding the princess away from the world so no one else could have her. There was no place in this world for him. Nowhere that meant happiness. Peace was a distant memory to Zeref Dragneel. His head rocked forward as his eyes closed tightly, trying hard to hold back his own suffering tears.

Fingertips padded across the tip of his chin and he couldn't help the automatic flinch as they rested gently on his skin. After so much time he was still so weary of her touch. With a single deep exhale the shadows began seeping back into his body, pulling that hateful feeling with them. Light from the outside world entered their small atmosphere, letting him absorb the pain he would inevitably see in her expression. Her eyes were damningly beautiful when they watched him so carefully, ensuring that he was all right. Always forgiving no matter how much death surrounded them at his command.

That dull pit fell to his stomach. No matter how much she cared for him, she couldn't accept that he was a monster. She couldn't see that he was dead and rotting away. She couldn't see it on the outside. Out there he appeared just as young and beautiful as she was, which, according to his research, she always would be if he taught her how to reach that magic of hers. More than anything Zeref wanted to protect this sweet creature so full of kindness and compassion from the darkness within himself. Being near him would only ruin her like everything else in this world. Yet, at the same time, he was the yin to her yang. Being near her calmed him, his curse hadn't been this active in weeks, she had a positive affect on him.

As the darkness receded back into his body he forced himself to look at the damage his fury had caused. Desolation and grey-black death surrounded them on all sides. The circumference of this wave was far enough that he could not see its end.

He could feel her watching his face, watching for a sign of doubt or pain. She knew she would always find it there. After Natsu died and he was expelled from school, he had learned loneliness. Being with her didn't give him time to reflect and think. She forgave his sins and distracted his work with gentle words and soft touches.

Releasing the tight hold on her arm, he slid his hands around to her back, holding her loosely, trying his best not to look at the dark violet bruise he made. Her forehead fell to the middle of his chest, directly over his heart. She trembled lightly as she let out fearful tears. His cheek rested on the top of her head, eyes closed, absorbing every sensation, feeling the guilt he deserved. He was in the process of thinking of the right way to apologize when she spoke.

"Zeref?" His body stilled at his name, Vala pushed back to look at his face. Without warning she popped up onto her toes and pressed a quick kiss to his lips. The painful spot where his heart resided felt like it could burst. How was she so merciful? Couldn't she see that she should run away?

"I hate your fear." He admitted quietly.

She already knew, but it was still good to hear it spoken. "I don't want to accept this path, if only you'd let me-"

"No. You cannot come with me. You have a life here, a family."

Then, with a small, sweet smile she asked, "Why would I want any of those things without you?"

Those words crushed his heart. He wanted to show that she deserved so much more than what he was. She couldn't see him through rose colored glasses. She couldn't foresee the future where she would die, leaving him nothing but sorrow and self-loathing hate. She never saw how awful things could truly become if she didn't have her guardian magic protecting her. She never learned, not even when they left together the following night.

Vala couldn't see that she was a fish sitting in the crocodile's mouth, waiting to be devoured. No, of course she couldn't. Her eyes weren't even open when he killed her. She couldn't see the very moment he lost every tether of humanity. She couldn't feel the pain when she was ripped from his grasp forever.


	4. Her Knight in Black Armor

Against all of Zeref's warnings and fear, Vala ran away with him the day before her wedding. She decided that she would rather die than spend even another minute in her hellish world of royal submission. It wasn't easy to hide his pleasure at the thought. He was, after all, trying to remain unaffected by the young woman's tenacity. Though, he had to admit, it was far easier said than done.

"What about this?"

Auburn hair curled and pinned into small spirals gave the effect that her hair was short and cropped tightly to her skull. A dark grey, nearly black, cloak covered her from head to toe with a wide hood embroidered with silver designs. It was simple, perhaps a bit too dark to suit her, but inconspicuous nonetheless. To Zeref, Vala looked totally different and yet completely the same. She still had dark eyelashes around her storming eyes and sun touched skin dotted with a few freckles.

What really gave her away was the way she walked, her movements were too stiff and smooth. She drifted out from behind a pillar to see if her disguise was good enough. As if she was floating, her head and shoulders would remain high and proper, kind of like a princess. Gone were her fine dresses, and yet somehow she appeared more beautiful now than she had dressed in finery. As if she was a pretty face in a crowed.

If someone was looking for her, and they would be, this small change wouldn't be enough. Drumming his fingers on his folded forearm he shook his head slowly.

Vala narrowed her eyes playfully with a small smirk hiding behind her lips, "What else would you have me do? Grow three inches taller?"

Zeref closed in on her with slow steps, eying her critically, and circling like a vulture. Standing tall and proud, Zeref touched either of her shoulders, pressing them down into a soft slouch. Running his hands from the backs of her shoulders, he touched the back of her hips, just at the waist. As a general rule Zeref had no idea what he was doing when it came to Vala, only that he reveled in his new found ability to make her weak. The back of her neck was exposed where he dropped a soft kiss, sending shivers down her spine and goosebumps over her arms. Tilting her head just a little, Vala gave a hooded look over her shoulder, catching his lips before he could pull away. He gave in and tilted his brow to her forehead, closing his eyes to absorb the moment. Within that small space between their lips he could feel her warm breath against his own as she spoke, "I need to loosen up a little, I suppose."

Reluctantly, he let her go and stepped back, using his own posture as an example. "Walk with a relaxed pace. Even if we see knights, we cannot run. Flight reactions are exactly what they will be looking for."

Zeref circled her once more, looking for flaws in their plan. He knew how dangerous this was. They had effectively started a war last night by magicking her away. Already they were hearing men on horseback and hunting dogs barking in the distance. The dark mage didn't want to give her back, but he also didn't want to see her become harmed for his sake.

Her hands suddenly took his wrists, stopping his mindless circling with an expression of concern. "What happens if they catch you?"

This was the way she was. She hadn't once worried about what would happen to a runaway princess or the repercussions of her betrothed if she was caught. She worried for Zeref as if he could not easily take care of them both.

A smile sneaked across his face, "I'll kill them."

Swallowing the first words that came to her mind, Vala blinked slowly before blushing a little. "You shouldn't kill people if you can control it."

This was another thing he truly enjoyed about Vala. She loved life, she cherished every waking moment. Cherished the lives of people she did not even know. Perhaps that was why this war was so unsettling in her heart. More than anything she just did not want to see people die because she ran away. She was beginning to see her choice as selfish. But Zeref refused to let her see it that way. This was a choice made in self preservation. In that foul prince's hands she would be crushed and war would have commenced regardless.

"What would you have me do?" He asked, rolling circles into her palms. "Let them take you?"

"No," Vala sighed a little, her eyes falling to their joined hands. "I'm afraid of what all of this could do to you. I've read some texts of mages who kill. They aren't quite human by the time they're through." Serene silver eyes lifted from their joined hands to his black eyes. "I don't want my actions to hurt you."

"I am a monster, Vala. I am not something to worry about." His words made her expression fall a bit.

"It's amazing how you've told yourself that so many times and now you're beginning to believe it's true." That sweet, forgiving light softened her gaze with a teasing smile as she touched a few fingers to the side of his jaw. "Haven't you ever read a fairy tale before? Princesses don't run away with monsters. Knights in shining armor come and save them from high, dark towers and they live happily ever after. Right?"

'Knight in shining armor' was absolutely not the way he would describe himself, especially not in Vala's case. As much as he would like to believe that he had saved her from an evil future, he couldn't see his motivation as pure. Whether or not she wanted to see that side of him was her choice. He simply benefited by having the opportunity to prove that he was more than just a killer. He was a lover, not a fighter. Everything he loved was pure, like Vala. Everything he hated was dark. Even his interest in the dark arts was pure. He wanted to renew life, was that really so wrong?

As much as he enjoyed the concern in her eyes, he also worried about her interests. In magic, specifically. He worried that it would grow too strong and she might begin attempting to access it on her own. Most people were unable to tap into their magic, but Vala appeared to be the kind who might be able to reach hers. She was relentless in that way.

Six months passed in an elated haze. Everything had been going well. _Too_ well.

Vala always curled under his right arm and buried her face against his chest when they slept under the stars. Some days it would rain and they would seek shelter in an inn, but that was uncommon. Zeref continued with his studies, and Vala continued to try and learn magic. Up until that point they had managed to avoid capture. Hunters and knights alike would tear apart the small villages the pair took refuge in. Hunters were sent by her betrothed's kingdom, knights were sent out by her brother. Zeref would prefer it if they were never caught, but if he had to choose then he'd take the knights above the hunters. Those were a few of the foulest humans he'd ever met.

Their first incident was a wake up call.

Vala woke one morning completely alone. Confused, she groggily found herself wandering through the trees, listening to a growling tummy. Rolling her eyes, she realized Zeref had probably gone to find them something to eat. Just beyond a grassy hill was a small town. She was careful not to go into towns alone, so she plopped herself down against an old oak and closed her eyes. Her hood fell over her face to block out all light. It helped her focus on the important things, like accessing her magic.

It took a long time to get to this point. She could actually feel it pulse through her body, but she could in no way reach it. She would do these little workouts until she was completely exhausted. Zeref would usually then find her, knowing what she'd been doing, and admonish her for being so foolish with a fearful tone to his voice. But, whether he liked it or not, this was something she needed. She needed control over one aspect of her own life. Even if it bothered her lover until he threatened to leave her in the middle of the forest, 'where no one could hear you scream'. A smile came across her face. Though he was not even remotely close to what she expected for herself, Vala was completely entranced by Zeref. He was so incredibly sweet. He taught her all kinds of things, from different species of animals and plants, to a number of theories regarding magic. She wouldn't understand half of those theories until she was actually able to use magic, it was just one more driving force behind her need for it. Another was her need to understand why Zeref would sometimes accidentally kill everything around him with no control over the waves that wrought him. She wanted more than anything to fix it, to cure him of the curse that plagued him.

Hooves crashing rhythmically nearby were what drew her from her meditations. Peeking from below the edge of her hood she saw a band of hunters. Brows low, she noticed something strange. One of their drawn carriages had a cage filled with women. Women with auburn hair and dirty faces.

Gods. Zeref was going to kill her for this.

Against every fiber of her body telling her not to, Vala followed them quietly. They came through the dirt road that split the town in two. Cobble stones paved the street on one side, more dirt paved the other. She dipped into an alleyway to watch the caravan pass. It was then that she saw who carried the keys to the grimy cage. All of the women on board looked either dead or dying. It ached Vala's heart to know she was the root cause of this. So, she had to do what she did.

Night fell slowly. Vala knew Zeref was probably losing his mind with worry at this point. But she was never known to be terribly obedient. The hunters were in a tavern. A cold thrill dripped through her heart as she entered the place, hood drawn tightly, and ordered a drink next to the massive man with the keys. By some luck, at the end of the night when everyone else had gone to sleep in a bed, the key holder found himself nearly passed out. Looking around briefly, she decided if she was going to do this she had to do it right now. Quietly and gently as humanly possible, Vala lifted the aged key ring from his belt where it was stuffed between leather and fat.

By some miracle, Vala wasn't caught. She paid for her barely touched drink and left hastily. Cloak wrapped tightly, Vala walked easily over to the caravan. One woman was awake enough to realize what was happening and woke the others quickly, preparing for their escape.

"Hey! Whacha think you're doin'?" A gruff voice came from a carriage down just as her stolen key entered the lock and turned. Before she could think, Vala swung open the door and ripped the key out, throwing it somewhere into the dirt as she took off running.

Sounds of groaning men and squealing women came from behind her. The women had all scattered, but it seemed that Vala was the prize those hunters really wanted. They abandoned the runaway women and went after the real princess. A band of them chased right behind. She juked and dipped through alleys and jumped and climbed over fences. But nothing she did could force them back. If anything, they gained on her. Quickly.

A massive hand grabbed a handful of Vala's hood, tearing it from her cloak. Another of his large hands took hold of her arm.

"Don't touch me!" The young, chestnut haired lady jerked her arm from a far larger man's grasp as she ran, now quickly running our of steam.

Terror rose up the back of her spine, settling in her stomach as she realized they had guided their prey into a dead end. Spinning on her heel, Vala stared them down as if she was twenty feet tall. She backed away from the encroaching crowed with a brave face. This Goliath of a man was after far more than the jewels in her bag. A disgusting smile came over his ugly mug as he took in her appearance.

"Come with us, li'l one. There's a nice sum o' money waitin' at the castle gates for the likes of you." He smiled with corn colored teeth, a few missing on the top. Vala took another step back when he showed the hilt of some hidden weapon, followed in suit by his equally disgusting cohorts. Fear bloomed in her chest like a deep bruise when she backed up to a wall as they circled in closer. Her hands searched the cold surface for any purchase.

Then, the wall she found herself clutching wrapped an arm around her middle. Another arm extended with both his middle and ring fingers tucked and pinky, index and thumb all spread. Dark tendrils burst from the ground, apprehending the disgusting man before he could get away. The darkness tightened around his body until Vala shouted something, breaking Zeref from his rage.

"Stop!" She squirmed in Zeref's protective hold to face him. "Please, no more death! Not when you can control it!"

After choking the group into submission, he allowed the thick tendrils to release with one hand. Rather than use that hand to kill, he pressed it to the back of Vala's head and pulled her closer as she relaxed. He took the first real breath of air since he found their campsite empty early in the morning. Since that chilling moment he'd been searching for her, that is, until he heard her voice.

Vala sighed against him and took a deep, shaking breath before snuggling even closer into his black clothed chest. Her hands twisted into the white fabric draped over his shoulder as if she would hide inside of him if she could.

"We should get married."

Zeref choked at her bold words, still staring at the bodies surrounding them. Still incredibly angry with her stupidity.

"Why did you come here?" was all he could manage in his furious state.

Her storming eyes shot him with lightning. "They were collecting women who looked like me, was I supposed to let them die for my sins?"

At that, Zeref lost his ability to speak. As usual, Vala came out of nowhere and left him unable to think coherently. Though she was sometimes infuriating in her lack of self preservation, she made up for it in times like these. Times when she would do something so selfless that he couldn't be overly upset. He tried his best to ignore her proposal, he was hoping it was a joke or that he'd somehow imagined it.

"But really. We should get married." She repeated her initial statement, looking up at him with those damningly sweet eyes. "I would stay with you forever if you would have me."

...

"—You're married? Is that what this is about?!" Natsu exclaimed, mouth hanging wide with a smile curving the corners of his lips. He looked almost happy to think such a thing.

Zeref hated to burst his bubble. "Not exactly. We were better off keeping our names away from any government record." He felt warmth fill his heart for the first time since the story began, "Though, nearly every night we spoke different vows. For example, I vowed never to leave a mark on her body again, and she vowed to make me break that vow." An upward tug came to his lips, remembering that night quite vividly.

Natsu was flabbergasted, "Why would she _want_ that?"

Zeref's face burned red with a shy little smile. He was not about to explain _that_ to Natsu. Besides, those memories were _far_ too private for him to speak of. Only he was allowed to know the exact curve of Vala's body, or the faded freckles that lined every surface of her soft skin. Or how she reveled in the marks he would leave on her hips, admiring them each morning with a grin that she tried hard to hide.

A knock came to the metal door and Natsu actually said good-bye to Zeref with one of his iconic grins. The black mage blinked and smiled back before the door closed, shutting him off from reality again. For the first time in a long while, he was able to enjoy the silence.


	5. Je Ne Regrette Rien

Zeref spent so many days and nights alone in that cell. It was easy to let his memories run away with him. One particular memory belonged only to him. No other living person could know what happened that first time. It was not the first time he'd felt her skin against his, but it was the first time he'd ever taken all of her. His eyes drifted closed, remembering in fine detail every sensation and thought that passed through his mind when he and Vala finally had each other completely...

...

In the stillness of night it was difficult to judge what was real. The feel of soft flesh against his own, the smell of sweet lavender, the quiet frush of fabric. Every movement was amplified, every sensation heightened. Like warm lips against one another, the scratch of nails across sensitive skin. Whimpering gasps, begging for more. Always more.

More than Zeref was able to give.

Panting and flushed, Vala looked up at him with such want for something he was too afraid to give to her. Though it would be a lie to say that he didn’t want to, he just couldn’t. No, he wasn’t afraid of physical intimacy, he and Vala were incredibly intimate. He had touched every bit of her body, every curve and indent was his and his alone. In return, Vala was the only one who had ever run her hands over him the way she did, she was always so timid. So, yes, it would be a lie if he tried to say he did not want that final intimacy with the sweet woman who saved him from loneliness. It was far more that he was afraid of hurting the exposed woman beneath him, his forearm braced over her head as he touched and caressed each bit of her body, learning the curve of each muscle and the amount of pressure needed to make her squirm.

Things would always change the moment she would attempt to reciprocate. Her hands over his stomach, fingertips memorizing his musculature— she was a masterful typographer when it came to his geography. Lips dipped into the spot on his neck that sent electricity dancing over his skin. Zeref loved the feel of her body against his. He loved how she knew him so well. Palpating fingertips ran through the sinewy tendons in his arms, or across the incredibly sensitive area around his pelvis.

But when she would touch just a bit further, everything would freeze.

He could see the disappointment in her eyes each time he stopped them. She wanted this as much, if not more than he did. Something about that final leap was too much.

Something was easier about skimming his own nimble fingers across her inner thighs. Gently molding her breasts, taking her pert nipples between his lips, gently raking them with sharp teeth to cause breathless sounds of abandon. Those sounds were enough to drive him mad with desire. It was a miracle that they didn’t whenever he found her pressing her hips up to his, begging and pleading for his touch. He was never strong enough to deny her such pleasure.

Moisture accumulated between her thighs for him, wanting and ready for something more. He wanted to, gods did he want to, but he was too afraid of causing her pain.

He once vowed to never cause her harm again. When he said those words, his eyes were locked to that dark bruise, swirling with the healing colors of green and yellow, where he once nearly crushed her arm. He never wanted to be someone to hurt Vala. It was the precise thing he planned to protect her from when he took her away from her home. If he caused her to bleed, to bruise, to cry… then he would no longer deserve to have her.

He’d never been with a woman before; he’d always been too wrapped up in his research to take notice of interested parties. Now that he took notice, it was hard to pay attention to anything else. Especially when she made it so obvious.

White fabric fell about her body, forming to the right curves, cascading over one shoulder and into a pool by her feet. While he was sleeping she had taken the wrap he wore over his shoulder and decided it would look better on her. He was not going to argue with the beautiful sight before him. Colder weather drove them indoors for about a week as a winter storm rattled the countryside. A real bed was appreciated by both weary travelers. More so by Vala who used it as her own weapon of pure torture.

Waking to scorching hot kisses dropped haphazardly across his neck and chest was always welcome. Waking to her legs wrapped around his waist, pulling away his clothes, was something entirely different.

"Vala…” His admonishment trailed as her lips lowered, falling across his flat stomach, dragging her lips over a hipbone, eliciting a muted gasp. Heather grey eyes peered up at him from the shadows of dark lashes when the tip of her hot pink tongue slid along the ridge between his hips and abdomen. Zeref’s fingers twisted in the sheets to either side of him, trying his best not to entice her any further. A smile pressed to his skin when she felt his anatomy harden against her chest. Zeref cursed to himself when her crouch lowered, eyes unmoving from his, as her lips touched him through the fabric of his black pants. The heat of her lips against him made him close his eyes, trying to think of any possible way to ignore the incredible feeling. He failed, throwing back his head as her mouth opened and her lips surrounded the tip of his cloth covered length. An unconscious jerk of his hips was all of the motivation Vala needed to continue her musings.

Before she could, Vala was pushed until her back was flat. Zeref’s lips were on hers instantly, gently rolling her bottom lip between his teeth. Her thin dress was gone almost instantly as he pulled it from her shoulder, pushing it to her waist to give him access to her. He followed her example and touched his lips down her stomach, splaying his hands over each surface he kissed until he reached her hips. This time Vala was the one to grab his face, she sat up and pulled him into a softer kiss. Her lips parted, inviting him to taste her. His tongue slid over the tip of hers as it ran salaciously over the inside of his upper lip, pulling him deeper and deeper into her. It was slow and easy.

While he was distracted by her pretty tongue she managed to undo his pants, freeing him. Zeref hissed when her fingers wrapped around him, running a thumb behind the head as she learned it would make him shiver. She pulled at him while leaning back to the bed, forcing him to go down with her. His larger hands collected her head between them, running his thumbs over her temples. He wanted to make it obvious to her that he was not going to take away her purity, not today.

Hips rose to meet his and he automatically pressed back against them, his tip gently touched her warmth, soaking him to prepare for something else.

That was where he stopped them. Slowly, he unfurled from their provocative position.

Her eyes grew wide and nervous, “Did I do something wrong?”

Zeref let his gaze fall from her eyes, to her beautiful body, then up again. He had a stunning woman in bed with him who wanted his body more than the air she breathed, and here he was denying her of that sweet air. He was a moron.

“I don’t want to hurt you.” He admitted quietly.

Vala’s eyes expressed the hurt in his denial, “Please, do you really think I’d let you hurt me if I didn’t want it?” Her hands took his and pressed one to the side of her cheek. “I’ve wanted this for so long, please don’t make me wait anymore.” Her lips pressed to his palm, “I want you, I want to know what this is, this deep feeling that makes me want your body inside of mine.”

The black wizard knew exactly what she was talking about. He felt it too, the driving need to join her body with his own. He wanted to know what it was like. He hated that he would have to make her bleed in order to know that feeling.

“I remember you made a promise not to hurt me.” Her hand smoothed over the bit of black hair that always seems to stand up at the back of his head. She learned it was due to a cowlick. Something about that was incredibly cute in her eyes. Lips slightly reddened from the abuse they’d been enduring curved gently, her eyes meeting his with a plea, “I also remember vowing to make you break that promise.” The smile fell a little, “It seems your defenses are a bit stronger than mine.”

When her fingers unraveled from his, she placed his hand over her chest to feel her heart beating. Those same fingertips traced up his stomach, then danced down again, drifting over him once more. Her thumb brushed the back of his tip, sending goosebumps across his arms. “I know you want this too, so please just…” The rest trailed as Zeref lowered himself over her, touching his lips to the center of her forehead, then her eyes, then her lips…

One hand enveloped her hip while the other moved between her legs, parting her gently to push a finger slowly into her. Her walls tightened around him when his thumb touched the bundle of nerves above her opening. Her lips parted against his with a whimper of pleasure. A smile broke out over his face, pressing his lips to the spot right below her ear, then just below at the top of her neck. His warm breath rose the small hairs on the back of her neck.

Small fluid sounds came from the spot where his fingers entered her body. Her scent was intoxicating. Vala couldn’t help feeling the same way as she slid her hand down his length.

When Zeref determined that she was stretched enough, he pressed his knee to hers, pushing it further to the side. He pressed her hand away from him, moving it instead around his neck and into his hair. Her insides trembled, her opening quivered. Her motions only eased when he pressed his tip to her and thrust his hips into her. Her breathing was up from the increasing adrenaline. Zeref made it his duty to appear calm even if he felt anything but calm.

It took a few forceful thrusts to break her. She clenched around him tightly, her nails dug into his back as she buried her face into his chest. He held her with one arm, kissing the top of her head, speaking softly to distract from the pain. He had read about this and always wondered why it had to be so painful, why couldn’t it just be easy? Why couldn’t biology choose another method of showing whether or not a woman was ready for this? He didn’t look down, he didn’t want to see her blood. It didn’t take much longer for her to unfurl and look up at him, wondering what should happen next.

Taking a page out of Vala’s book, he did what felt right in the moment and pulled himself out. Then thrust back in, though she winced, she also had a look of satisfaction. She was proud of herself for making him break his promise even when she was so uncomfortable.

But he couldn’t see it from her perspective. What she saw was a glass ceiling broken and shattered all around her. She saw the man she loved looking down at her with the same feeling shining through dark black eyes. The heightened sensations did not prevent her from enjoying the affectionate way he went about it all. Whether or not it was intentional was not Vala’s prerogative. It was the sweet way he spoke into her ear, or smiled nervously when he thought he’d hurt her. She was uncommonly gracious in her motions; she pushed her hips up to meet his, in a rhythm older than magic.

Zeref had to close his eyes again and pressed his forehead to hers when he felt that pressure build to the point of explosion. Sharp teeth gritted together when his release finally came in short bursts, fireworks went off in his eyes with each final throe. Each pulse caused a small sound in the base of his throat. Vala grinned up at him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, her temple to his brow.

Words weren’t necessary in that quiet moment. Snow built up in their window, fogging the glass from their rapturous actions. Without words, they both came to the silent realization that they were completely and utterly in love with one another.


	6. Mystery Achievement

As usual, Natsu came to visit Zeref. But, for whatever reason, he appeared completely exhausted. Zeref wanted to ask but there was something about the look in Natsu's eyes that told him he didn't really want to talk about it.

Zeref closed his eyes for a moment to remember exactly where he had left off the day before. Then it came to him. Dread chilled his blood. He wasn't even sure that Natsu would ever speak to him again when he heard the conclusion of Vala's tale. Not that Zeref would blame him. With a heavy heart, he started somewhere a little easier. A nice, happy memory before the world came crashing down on him.

"For five years Vala and I ran together. Violent wars broke out among the kingdoms, people were dying and Vala could not keep her mind away from the choices she made. Was it wrong to leave everything behind? Was it a childish whim? I did my best to keep her smiling, but some days it was too hard for her to look beyond the surrounding horrors. She feared for her family, she feared for our lives, and she feared being caught."

The dark mage took a breath, which ended in a sigh. "That's why I convinced her that we needed to get away from the area entirely. We spent a few months on an island in the tropics, an island I became very familiar with later in life..."

...

The time they spent on that island let them live fully. No other people resided there. Zeref's only worries were for the animals. But, as animals always seemed to learn faster than humans, the local fauna learned to stay away.

In the abundant sunlight, Vala blossomed. She found herself happier there than anywhere else they had visited.

Gone were her hooded cloaks. Vala donned very little, opting to steal the white toga he usually tied over his left shoulder. She tied it over her body like a long dress that slung over one shoulder. It suited her nicely, it was part of why he continued to carry that particular item with him for the rest of his long life.

When she noticed the way his eyes would watch her, Vala felt it necessary to, erm, _distract_ Zeref in any way she possibly could. If he was reading, she was just above the top of his book. Just within visual range, she would decide to go for a swim in one of the abundant tidal pools. It didn't take long for him to drop his books and follow her example. He couldn't always tell whether or not she did these thing to purposefully distract him, or if she just naturally drew his mind away from the task at hand.

When he reached the water's edge, Vala was submerged at the bottom, examining a brittle starfish. The water was clear as crystal. Marine hues dappled jagged rocks and fish alike. When she came up for air, her fiery hair fanned out on the water's surface, covering her body only enough to entice. Vala was none the wiser to her inhuman charms, or so he thought. Treading water, she motioned for him to join her with a sweet smile, light eyes threaded with dark promises.

She was an extraordinarily bad example to follow.

Unbeknownst to him at the time, Zeref had let his research entirely fall away for that short period of time. He felt at peace with his curse. He was still curious about life and death, but it seemed distant compared to the perfection that surrounded him. He could go months, nearly a year at one point, without killing anything. Palms and gorgeous tropical flowers would wilt in his presence. It was upsetting sometimes, but then Vala would pull him away and distract him with things he couldn't kill, like the gradation of sand across the beach or how the older, dried corals appeared to have made a home for birds. He never got too close to the things Vala loved, he didn't want to be the one to kill her happiness.

He didn't have to worry about hurting any other humans during those two short months unless they went back to the main land for supplies. Even then, with Vala by his side, he was unafraid.

The only fear he still harbored was that of losing her. Whenever she would bring up her past, her family, her little sister, she would lose the glow in her eyes. It was especially bad when they went to the mainland for any reason. Zeref did not want her to decide that their nomadic life was too much. When they first started traveling together he found himself laughing at her inability to care for herself, which she took as a challenge. After that she read every piece of literature she could find on wilderness survival. In no time at all Vala was able to build her own fire, create her own shelter, tie elaborate knots, and even learned how to clean a fish. Since Zeref chose to be a vegetarian, Vala tried to stray away from her own meat-eating tendencies. Though, her conviction never lasted too long.

Vala slept in the grass beside Zeref, enjoying the scent of truly clean air and the rush of leaves that surrounded them. His fingers drew circles into her back, enjoying the look of utter serenity in her expression. Though she was born a princess, raised in finery and golden embellishment, she chose to remain by Zeref's side. She chose to follow her heart and to keep him from being consumed by loneliness. For that, he felt he could never repay her.

After their time on that island, the two found themselves holing up in an old motel. It was not large by any means, but the owner was kind enough to let the 'young married couple' stay at a modest rate so long as no other customers needed the room. The village in which they took refuge was remote, Zeref was relived that Vala knew the local language or else they would have been stuck wandering through another winter. And in Vala's current condition, that was simply not an option.

Ragged gasps followed another slosh of her stomach contents. A gentle hand smoothed the middle of her aching back. The retching didn't cease, but she was finally able to sit back and take a few natural breaths before a water skin appeared in her hand. Sheepish smiles were exchanged as she grimaced over the nasty acidic taste in her mouth.

This was the only reason they left the island at all. Zeref would have felt content staying there forever. But with Vala slowly dying of dehydration he was forced to make the executive decision to bring her back to the main land for treatment.

It had been weeks that she felt like this. Her skin was pale, some days it took all of her strength just to eat. She couldn't eat much and she couldn't stop drinking massive amounts of water. He suspected it made up for the increasing number of times she would get sick each day. The thing that confused him the most was that these symptoms were not accompanied with any fever or chills. Zeref even recommended sending her to a hospital, or really, taking a hospital hostage until they told him what was wrong with her. She laughed at the suggestion, but she honestly wasn't sure if he was joking or not.

...

"To be clear— I wasn't joking." Zeref added, smiling just wide enough to show his lengthened canines. Natsu grinned back in full support.

...

Trembling under his hands from utter dehydration and exhaustion, he planted a light kiss to her temple and sat beside her on the bathroom floor. A smile smoothed its way across her lips, leaning into the affectionate gesture until their bodies were formed into one another. His arms fell naturally around her dainty shoulders as her cheek nestled into his chest. It appeared that she had caught some stomach bug while they were on that island. The rainforests were filled with foreign diseases that no one knew how to cure. Luckily she seemed alright otherwise aside from feeling incredibly tired and sore. It was only a passing illness, it seemed.

"You're nothing but trouble."

Vala gave a weak smile, "But I'm _your_ trouble."

He certainly couldn't argue with that. In fact, he was so sure that he was in love with the trouble she caused that he one day found himself with a small ring, waiting for the right time to make those real vows. Not just some small ones made under the cover of night, but the kinds that couldn't be broken. Vows like promising Vala his heart for all eternity and accepting the responsibility of her own until it stopped beating.

But Zeref never got the chance to make those promises.

After another month of feeling wretched, Vala was back on her feet and they went about their secret life in that little village as she recovered. Things slowed down for a time while they were staying there. No one could speak Zeref's language, so, to his delight, the locals left him alone. They appeared to enjoy Vala's company though. She was always greeted with smiles and expressions of concern, glancing quickly to him then back to her with frightened eyes. Vala would wave her hands a little and explain that she was beginning to feel much better. Because of this, Vala was the one to go out and find any of their necessary items. And for the most part, Zeref didn't feel the need to worry over her safety. They hadn't had to hide from hunters or knights in over a year and by some miracle Vala had actually learned her lesson during her first run in with them.

Why couldn't things always be so simple?

But as things seem to come and go cyclically in all relationships, their world slowly became more and more complicated. At least, Vala thought it was. At night Zeref would just look at her with this adoring smile. She knew he was just appreciating her, but Vala's face would burn red and she couldn't help but just turn over to hide her face. Her age had caught up to his and it upset her greatly. Eventually she would grow older. People would mistake him for her son. She would have to watch as her body decayed even though her lover could not age.

That was why she began trying to access her magic again. She read in his notes a long time ago that her family had some rare magic inside that could make them immortal if they could only tap into it. But control took time. If she weakened her barrier for even an instant it would be long enough for Zeref's curse to end her life.

Learning how to control magic you never knew existed on your own is pretty difficult, as it turned out. Vala had to concentrate on the thrum of her magic to even imagine grasping it. She envisioned herself reaching through her own soul to touch it, bend it, and push it from her body. Zeref warned her against doing this, he was afraid that she might one day manage to push her protective magic away completely. He threatened to leave if she continued trying. But she wanted to be like him. When she told him she wanted to be with him forever she was not bluffing. She wanted to be able to protect herself if she needed. He thought this was foolish. Why did she need protection when she had him by her side?

Rather than being the obedient person he knew she wasn't, Vala sat in silence in their room after Zeref went out. He planned to be away for the whole day to look for some herb that could help with her sickness. It hadn't completely gone away and it was beginning to make him a bit nervous.

Vala knew he had nothing to worry about. She only recently came to the realization that she'd been trying so hard not to acknowledge. A smile came over her lips at the thought, but then quickly fell to the floor. Maybe he didn't want things to turn out this way, Vala certainly never planned for it. It was a happy accident, but an accident none the less. What if he was angry when she told him?

Regardless of her feelings on the matter she planned to tell him later when he came home. She could think of the right way to word it when she was done. For now she needed to concentrate.

Diving into that dark place inside where her magic resided, untouched by her own mind, she reached and climbed, straining hard against the tight bands of energy holding her away. The magic protected itself from her touch, something she had never read or heard of in any book. Most were able to grasp their magic from birth, perhaps that was why it resisted her so firmly.

Night fell some time ago, not that Vala would know. She was too busy pushing herself to exhaustion just to get her hands on a strand of her own inner magic to notice the time. Or how incredibly hungry she was.

But finally, after so much time, she was finally able to grasp it. Something about her magic felt warm. She felt that wave of warmth spread throughout her limbs, tickling the very surface of her skin, sending shivers all over. Suddenly drained of any and all energy, Vala pitched forward, catching herself with one hand, curling another arm around her abdomen. Something in her belly tickled with warmth.

Somewhere in the pit of her stomach she knew she should have just listened to Zeref.


	7. Deadly Misconceptions

" _Vala_!"

The princess's concentration cracked at the sound of Zeref's voice through the door; followed quickly by the jarring sounds of him throwing it open then pinning it closed, locking it immediately. He was out of breath, leaning heavily against the wooden frame. Alarm was plain in his dark wild eyes when he rushed into their room.

He seemed disheartened when he saw that she was in a semiconscious state, seated with her legs crossed on their bed. Vala knew she'd been caught, but she couldn't find it in herself to care about his personal fears. She was too busy trying to sort through what had just happened herself. With no guidance she was left to use old notes of his and books from her homeland written in a dead language to try and figure out what her magic was and how to access it.

Though she was not afraid, she also was not foolish. She knew what he was capable of. She had seen the destruction, the utter chaos his waves of death predation could cause. She needed to find this power to protect people. A hand instinctively covered her belly. She had to protect _him_ if she ever needed to. Even if it meant her own death, she would protect someone who could not protect themself.

Zeref was under the impression that she had caught a stomach bug from the tropical island they lived on for that short period of time. In a way, he was right. She had caught _something_ , but it was no illness that she intended to cure. No, she had caught something a bit more long term and he was the contagion. When she imagined his reaction to what she was about to tell him she almost wished the little tickle in her belly _was_ just a mere sickness.

"We need to leave." He announced as he strode past her, his words were a command— not a request.

She didn't budge, still exhausted from her internal training and still trying to think of how to bring up the subject of their impending parenthood. "Okay, just give me a second."

Her words didn't brighten his dark mood as he rushed about the place, "You haven't moved since this morning." He started to say as he threw their few belongings into her canvas bag. When she still didn't move, his motions slowed and he trained his eyes on her tired expression. "Never hide anything from me again. I know what you've been doing and there is no need to pretend anymore."

Vala blushed, embarrassed. She didn't want to scare him by saying how she finally got a hold of it, that it felt like her whole body was encased in fire. Or that their little belly tickle felt like a hot coal burning through her flesh. Though if she was being honest with herself she _did_ want to brag about her accomplishments to the master of dark magic.

"I almost grasped it today," she smirked up at his slowing motions as his lips fell into a small, brooding frown. "If I concentrate a little harder next time I might be able to manipulate magic by the end of the next decade."

Zeref didn't smile. His eyes didn't brighten the way they would with her other small victories, like learning to tie a double Winsor knot. He didn't even acknowledge her self-depreciating humor. His face grew taught with anxiety as he glanced to the door of their not-so-legal apartment, calculating something quickly. "I can't let you die by my own hands."

Heart fluttering fearfully Vala wrapped her arms around her belly. She was out of time. She couldn't help the words that left her mouth, "I can't let you hurt him either, Zeref."

Her face scrunched, pinning her eyes closed, knowing she'd just jumbled it.

The muscles of his back tightened, straightening his posture instantly. She imagined his eyes were probably wide as well. At those words the dark mage finally looked at her and her eyes peeked open. He looked more angry than she was expecting. If only she knew why he was in such a rush to leave.

"Who are you trying to protect from me?"

Oh, this was not how she wanted to tell him at all. Vala wanted to bury her head and die. "Take a deep breath, there are some things you must learn to hear without losing your temper."

Those words didn't appear to help her situation, though now at least he appeared before her, looking quite sour. Vala swallowed hard, feeling her emotions as a tight ball in her throat, catching her words before she could say them.

...

"...What she didn't know was that on my earlier route to find a few medicinal herbs to help with her condition, I came across a group of knights. We hadn't seen them in months, years even. They were looking for Princess Vala, who was stolen by the infamous Black Wizard, Zeref." The darkness of his cell helped Zeref convey exactly how much he disliked that title. "They were speaking a language I could understand, laughing about how foolish I was to steal a bride the day before her wedding. How I had single-handedly incited a war between two nations and caused the deaths of thousands. How foolish I was to believe the princess wouldn't find a way to escape my clutches. How she was meeting an informant in the village, speaking in that incomprehensible tongue so that I could not understand." His voice softened, "In my mind it almost started to make sense."

Zeref paused to look across the dim fire at Natsu. He appeared utterly enthralled. 

"I started to believe what they were saying. Why would they lie? They had no sense that I was listening. What finally made me go back to Vala was their suggestion that she was leaving that night. That she had planned this escape with a local when she was still very sick. A local who I would surely decimate if I managed to get my hands on them first..."

...

The King's knights mentioned how Vala had left traces everywhere she went so that they could follow. They spoke of her fate, how she had met with an informant in the village. How they were lucky that Zeref could not understand their language.

His pulse raced, that couldn't possibly be true. Vala would never do such a thing. Vala would never betray his trust in such an underhanded way.

Then reality seeped through his defenses. How else could they have found this remote little town _on another continent_? When she left during the day and spoke with the locals in that language he couldn't understand, was she actually telling them to alert her kingdom? The fearful glances from villagers felt more and more accusing as he thought back to them.

The way the knights spoke of Vala told him that they were under the impression that he really did kidnap her. That he was not her savior, instead he was truly the evil mage who stole the princess and captured her for his own indulgence. Maybe she had finally come to that conclusion herself. Maybe it was true. Maybe he really did capture her as a sweet possession for only him to enjoy. Perhaps his dark desires were deeper rooted than he liked to believe.

Somewhere in the darkness he felt as if Vala was a possession of his. No one else was allowed to have her. In reality he was the one who belonged to no one but the beautiful auburn haired woman seated on their shared bed. If she chose to leave then he would have no one.

Something about that realization brought a cold weight to his stomach.

Even worse was the conclusion his mind jumped to. That dark kernel in the back of his mind that always seemed to pipe in when he was too angry for words wanted him to seal her away with his dark magic. Hide her away from the world until there was no one for her to care for except for him. There was nothing Vala valued more than bringing happiness to another person. He could lock her away in darkness until he appeared to be the light. Only then would she ever need him the way he needed her.

In his already primed mind, Vala's words had verified Zeref's deepest fear— she was leaving him and everything they dreamed of.

She wanted to protect someone from him, someone important. Someone innocent who was only trying to help their princess. She had lead the knights to their doorstep to protect that person. He could barely make himself look at those tired grey eyes as she smiled up at him, trusting him with every drop of blood in her veins. To think that she was capable of such utter betrayal broke his heart.

Why not just disappear from his life? Why not just tell him that she no longer wanted to run? She was always open about her fears, why would she keep this incredibly important piece away from him? Was it because he wouldn't let her reach her magic? Because he wanted to keep her safe? Things were always better when they were together, why did she want to throw all of that away? The leaps and bounds he'd made with controlling his cursed magic felt empty without her there by his side.

In the end, he was right from the beginning. Vala was meant to live in a castle, high above his head where he could never reach her. This only darkened his heart further.

"There's something I need to tell you." She patted the spot next to her; the other hand remained on her belly where a small but persistent little squirming happened. A nervous smile came to her lips. She needed to tell him, even if the timing was completely awful.

His expression was one of cold pain, as if he'd been shot through the heart with a poisoned arrow. With a pout, her hand reached up for his, but he swayed out of reach, black eyes empty and sad. She cocked her head a little. There was only one explanation for the sharp, pained expression on his face: a misunderstanding.

He always did this. He was paranoid and misconstrued her words. It was fairly predictable at this point.

Vala let out a small, exasperated sigh. "Zeref—"

"Stop." He silenced her and stepped back, breathing deeply with one hand pressed out before him to keep her at bay as she stood slowly, wincing from the burning sensation in her stomach. He was sometimes pained by these waves of death, other times he was not. He called it a curse. Vala could understand why. She wanted nothing more than to absorb that misery for him. Right now he was on the verge of a bad one.

Vala frowned a little. He was probably upset that he would likely kill everyone in this little village they had come to know. She couldn't disagree with that solemn feeling, but she stood and tried to come closer, but the sharp glint in his black eyes told her to stay back for reasons aside from his curse. Sadness flooded her veins, lowering her whole expression. Was this really how he was going to act just moments before she could tell him about the life they'd created? Maybe now wasn't the right time after all…

There was a heavy knock at the door. Vala's eyes went wide wide as they turned over her shoulder toward the rattling door. Zeref's equally wide eyes followed suit, knowing what would come next.

Mere seconds passed before the knocking turned to ramming, quickly cracking the wood. Vala's heart leaped from her chest and she skittered further into the room, looking to Zeref as she always did when she was afraid. But he couldn't look at her, all he could see were the growing fractures of wood as it split. It was a weak thing, it wouldn't take long for them to break it down and take her away. He was trying hard to brace himself for the terrible pain in his heart that would surely follow. Whether it would be from the guilt of killing them all, or the loss of Vala, he hadn't yet decided. 

"Princess! Do not fear we are here to help!" A gallant sounding tenor declared through the crack in a foreign language.

Vala's heart twisted, she understood those words, even if Zeref couldn't. The rapidly darkening look in his eyes told her that he was officially completely overwhelmed. She wanted to do something to get them both out of there as quickly as possible before something awful happened.

Silver eyes flickered from her black mage, to the door, to the windows. There was no way out unless they fought. Vala didn't know a kick from a can-can, and she certainly couldn't do anything with her brand new magic. At least not that she knew how to control. Surely Zeref did not want to hurt the knights, but she also wasn't sure if he could simply watch them take her away.

Hot tears sprung to her eyes, frustration quickly overtaking every other emotion. She couldn't go back there. She couldn't go back to that way of life. She couldn't have her body and mind broken every single day, not again.

The five years that she spent with Zeref in the wilderness, fighting off storms and riding out the heat of summer and falling in love was the best time of her life. Crazy things had happened, she learned more during that short time than in any of her advanced classes in the castle. She learned that a look shared between lovers could sometimes explain an emotion better than any words. Magic, the one thing that she always found herself yearning for, was just within her grasp. But she could easily live without magic forever if it meant she could still have Zeref. Keeping both was feeling more and more like an impossibility.

Cold trails followed warm tears as they rolled over her cheeks when she brought her eyes back to her dark mage. Right now he was the picture of hatred: eyes red, expression dark and shaded. The way he held his body was unusually tall and still. He looked like a dragon ready to protect its treasure.

Wood splintered, scattering across the floor. Vala was frozen in place. Everything felt as if it was moving in slow motion, but still too fast to keep up.

_This_ was why Zeref was in such a black mood. Not because of the secret she'd been hiding for the past few months. Not because he caught her trying to do magic.

He thought he was losing her forever. And he was right.


	8. Zeref's Confession

Natsu had a little frown on his face, a little nervous about where this was going.

"It all happened so fast. Too fast." Zeref's voice choked a little, trying hard to hold back the sorrow that overwhelmed him as he relived those final moments. "I was cruel, and foolish. I hurt many people, but above all else I hurt Vala..."

...

Where did it all go so wrong? Weren't they laying in the sun just a month prior? Weren't they bickering over the importance of red meat in ones diet last night? Didn't she realize that he loved her? Hadn't she spoken those words so softly into his ear only a few nights before? Hot pain drove through his heart when his gaze drifted to Vala's face. She appeared even more shocked than he was. It was a relief to know that she hadn't given their position away. But then, how did they find her? It was far too much to sort through in one very small moment.

Before Vala could reach Zeref with his hand twisted into his black hair with wide angry eyes aimed at the broken door, the squad of knights burst through. The very moment their eyes found Vala, an unnatural cold settled over the room, paint peeled from the walls, even the light seemed to die away into something dull.

"Princess!" One of the knights, donned head to toe in white armor gaped at the rosette haired woman. A cold sweat came over her when he spoke again, this time looking to Zeref. "We mean you no harm, Mage." Vala dropped her head to her chest, hands fisting the fabric of her cloak when she heard the sharp slide of metal against metal. "The king has ordered us to take her at any cost."

Zeref's face was something to fear in that moment. The flesh above his nose was gnarled, fists so tight at his sides that his knuckles cracked. Vala closed her eyes. She knew Zeref would kill for her, but she had never seen his dangerous magic in action. He was always so calm and serene around her. The closest she ever came to seeing his anger was when he feared that she would leave him all alone so many years ago.

But, in the end, those knights never stood a fighting chance.

There was a blast of black energy that pushed everything away from the epicenter of evil, including Vala. Her head hit the wall with enough force to knock her out, but she somehow managed to cling onto consciousness long enough to watch Zeref's entire countenance grow dark and hateful. His eyes were sharp and red, brows lowered. One of the knights did not die from the dark magic and instead he remained folded over the jagged pieces of the broken door. He looked over at Vala, catching her eyes just long enough for her heart to break. She needed to get up. She needed to do something to stop Zeref from killing. Not when he had the power to stop.

But everything was closing in, growing darker and darker with each passing second. So dark that she couldn't see, pulling her consciousness with it.

Only after the horror and decay left his body did Zeref finally come down from his furious hate. He had done this with full awareness and control, and he didn't even regret it. Something about that disgusted him, when did lose his humanity? He let out a pained groan as the curse made itself known somewhere deep inside. He didn't concern himself over Vala, but he did think briefly on the sweet old lady who owned the inn, and the little family who lived across the hall. No one else in this room was living, he would have to deal with the heavy burden of that guilt when he and Vala escaped.

A pulse of evil burst from his body that was strong enough to drop him to his knees, leaving a black mark where he settled on the floor.

His head remained still, cradled gently between his hands. He cast a sideways glance at the ruined bodies of the knights who came to take Vala away from him and smiled ever so slightly. Even if he regretted the deaths of the locals, he couldn't find it in him to regret the deaths of these people. There was a sick part of him that wanted to truly steal her away, to hide her away in the darkness until he appeared to be the sun in comparison. He wanted Vala to need him the way he needed her. He wanted to know who it was that she wanted so badly to protect from his cursed black magic.

Right now, that dark place was the only part of him that could think clearly. He was so used to feeling Vala's soft hand over his shoulder after his waves of death subsided that he waited for that small, familiar comfort. Ignorant of the dribble of ruby blood that fell from the corner of her lips where she slumped motionless against the wall.

Maybe he didn't notice, but she felt it immediately. The curling hot blood that dripped from her mouth woke her instantly. It tasted like metal. Sharp pain in her belly crushed her body closer to the ground with a muted whimper. Cold fear settled in her heart when she realized what was happening.

The thing she was trying to tell Zeref about only a few minutes earlier. Her little 'stomach bug'. The little tickle she'd been feeling in her belly for the past few weeks was squirming. Twitching even. Actually, her little tickle wasn't just a little tickle anymore. It was a convulsing raging pain that reduced her to a crumpled, bleeding mess there on the floor, a mere five feet away from her lover.

Zeref's eyes were still that deadly red when he finally looked to her, wondering why she didn't come to him like she usually did. His mind was so far from reality that he thought she might actually be afraid and hiding. But the moment his eyes focused on her crumpled body where it lay in a tight ball across the room, his heart stopped. Seeing _her_ blood snapped him from his state of rage. Perhaps magic couldn't hurt her, but an impact like that easily could have broken her fragile bones.

Uncoordinatedly he clambered over to her spot on the floor. His hands hovered over her back. He was too afraid to touch her as she convulsed tightly again and again. This was more than a few broken bones. There was too much blood, he knew some healing spells but he couldn't figure out where it was all coming from. Had his magic harmed her? At first he blamed her and the fact that she had been trying to access her magic just moments before he stepped through the door. But when he managed to find a clearer mind, the puzzle pieces clicked together. It didn't take long to understand what was truly killing his lover.

"What happened? Why are you..." His voice trailed desperately, finally grasping what she had been trying to tell him earlier. The sickness, the drive to control her guardian magic. The blood, it was...

...

Zeref took a shaking breath and dropped his head, unable to look at anything as those haunting images flooded his mind. Natsu was dead silent for once, just staring as the realization of Zeref's description came together. He fell against the shackles that held him and dropped his head, tears dropping from the tip of his nose, sharp teeth gritting together.

After a few heavy seconds, a soft, brittle voice came muffled through the darkness as Zeref continued to the best of his ability. "When I realized what I'd done I could barely breathe..."

...

He couldn't look at her and the damage he inflicted. Dull grey eyes searched for him when he managed to untangle her limbs from her abdomen to pull her onto his lap. Blood trickled from the corner of her mouth. Her eyes were bloodshot from the mind splitting convulsions that had yet to cease. Each tremor came with another choked sound as blood continued to pour from her body, taking her warmth with it. He pulled her tightly into his arms and felt as her life slowly drained from his grasp. Maybe he didn't have the power to kill Vala, but the little thing inside of her was vulnerable, and that impossibly small piece of Zeref was enough to end her life. Tears flowed freely from his eyes as he held her like she was the only thing tethering him to sanity.

Why didn't she tell him sooner? This could have been prevented. He could have... He should have just...

Hot tears sunk through her bloodstained clothing. She was staring at the ceiling awaiting the cold embrace of death. But it was slow to take her. She watched the life leave Zeref's eyes instead as he felt her bleed out.

Vala felt her moments growing fewer but she couldn't find his eyes. Words that needed to be said gasped from her throat in those final breaths, "Zeref... I..."

His chin crumpled and he folded over her, rubbing his thumb hard over her sternum to keep her awake, "Don't say anything, there are spells, they're unpleasant but..." His voice choked out as he realized none of his spells could keep her the way she was without tainting her soul. He couldn't become the reason she couldn't ascend. He could seal her away with dark magic, but even then he wasn't sure if she could recover.

Grey eyes nearly matched her skin tone, her lips a ghastly white as she smiled. A set of fingertips brushed the side of his face leaving a macabre red trail, his eyes grew wide as he shook with adrenaline.

A trembling breath shuddered past her smiling lips, "I love you."

Zeref caught her hand and held it to his lips, wanting to make her warm again. "Don't... Don't say that."

His words met deaf ears.

He felt hollow. He felt dead. For the first time he couldn't feel anything. No pain, no sorrow, no sense of loss. Everything was completely gone. He wanted death now more than ever and he would do anything in his power to have it. He killed everyone and everything he could find in this void, including Vala's entire kingdom. Their castle was nothing but a shell when he was finished, even then he wasn't quite satisfied. He still didn't feel remorse the way he wanted to. So he ended every surrounding village as well.

Without a feeling of empathy, he decided he shouldn't be alive. He would then create demons and hell-spawn beyond anyone's most horrible nightmares if it meant that he could die. Even if it meant that these demons could escape, killing thousand of innocent people. By the time he could think clearly through the villanous haze he lost himself in, Vala's body was gone from the site where he left her. Had she decayed away? Had someone been kind enough to bury her remains? He would never know. He knew Vala's afterlife would be something far different from his, but he didn't care. He didn't deserve to live if he had no regard for life.

...

"I don't remember what happened after that, only that I woke covered with blood in her family's throne room surrounded by bodies, staring at the mangled body of Vala's younger sister who looked just like her." Zeref's voice slowly faded. He finished that part of the story without allowing even one tear to fall. He chose to disconnect himself from those mournful feelings a long time ago. He'd mourned Vala for long enough. She and the tiny potential for life they'd created out of their love for one another. It wasn't until another fifty years passed that he found her old notes on Tenrou Island. The things she wrote about him in her swirling handwriting were what made him decide to stay there indefinitely. She wrote how important his life was to her, and how her only regret was the fast that her disappearance caused war. Zeref couldn't help but feel the weight of that responsibility when he read those words. He had caused more death and destruction than any war Vala helped to start. But that was all gone now, all that existed was the darkness that surrounded him and the pink haired young man who sat across from him.

Silence sunk into his veins and allowed Zeref a sense of peace that he didn't feel like he deserved. The darkness in this cell was not his own, it gave him too much time to remember his life. Everything he'd ever done was cruelty. The only kindness he had ever shown was to Natsu, Mavis, and Vala.

"You killed Vala and your baby." Natsu finally said, voice low and accusing, sitting across from his heavily chained brother.

'Lord Zeref' looked like an abused puppy from where Natsu sat. He couldn't imagine losing the person he loved, or worse, being the reason that they died. Something about Zeref's curse created something evil inside of him, and Vala's death obviously brought that out. It wasn't in his nature to push someone away who obviously needed help. Considering how many people he hurt, it made sense for him to hate his brother. But he couldn't look past how much of his life Zeref dedicated to reviving him. He couldn't help but wonder why he didn't do the same thing with Vala and their baby.

Pain was plain on Zeref's unguarded expression. He didn't particularly want to say anything more. He didn't want to tell his younger brother how he didn't feel anything toward life or death again until a full century later. Or how the day he met Mavis he thought he'd met Vala's reincarnation but quickly learned that they were not at all the same. He did not make the same mistake twice, he taught Mavis magic because he wanted her to protect herself, even if the magic was dark. It wasn't his decision to make whether or not she used it, it was hers. After that he went back to Tenrou Island to try and prevent any more death than necessary. He didn't want to tell any more grisly details about how many lives he'd ruined. It was all far too painful.

"Vala," Zeref managed to choke over his tight throat, "she died because of my ignorance. The reason I'm telling you this is because her people still exist to the far east on a distant continent. They continue fighting to this day over an unnecessary blood feud. Her kingdom split in two after I decimated their land. They accuse one another of inciting the rage of Ankhseram on their people. Once they learn the truth, that I was the one who killed their land and their people, maybe then they will stop fighting." He paused, remembering something he nearly chose not to share. "There's also book there, sealed and hidden in that old temple I described. Destroy it."

Natsu dropped his eyes to the side and folded his arms over his chest, thinking hard on something. When their daily time was up, Natsu left without a word. And after such a horrifying story, Zeref was sure he'd never return.

* * *


	9. Vala's Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut. Smutty, smutty, smutty, smut. That's all this chapter is. There is an actual chapter to follow, I just needed to get this out of my system. Enjoy!

"Zeref," Vala warned gently as her red-eyed lover stalked closer. He was predatory, and she was the prey.

Nude as the day she was born, Zeref easily twisted her hair back, holding her body to his, not even a whisper between them. Her head was jerked back until she was looking directly up at those half-mast red eyes. When he’d gotten enough of the nervous glint in her eyev her exposed throat gave him ample access to the sensitive skin there.

Parted lips pressed to her neck, sucking a bit of her skin past sharp teeth to create a deep violet mark, then another, then another… gently running those sharp canines to the silent pulse at the side of her throat. A light gasp escaped, ending in a hummed moan as hot kisses trailed along her jaw to the defenseless area below her ear.

He took the time to slowly run the tip of his nose to the shell of her ear before resolutely deciding, "You're mine, Vala. Only mine." The soft purr of his voice against the fine hairs of her ear sent salacious shivers down her spine.

Dizzy and intoxicated by his overwhelming presence, Vala suddenly forgot what they were arguing about. Firm fingertips pressed to the curve of her hip, fabric slowly pulling up and over her shoulders until she was completely covered.

Ahh, yes. _Right_.

The hot spring.

Zeref only left long enough to be gallant. Not that Vala needed him to be so prudish, but she appreciated the effort. Though he wasn’t gone long, it was long enough for a local ruffian to join her on the other side of the bamboo barrier. She had heard the swish of water, but assumed it was Zeref. It wasn't long after that the foolish man realized Vala was enjoying the warm water on the other side. Peeking his head around the wall was a bad idea for him, Vala hadn't even noticed. But her ever-so-vigilant guardian did.

Vala was thoroughly convinced that Zeref never learned to understand the concept of ‘sharing’ or ‘cooperation’. Jealousy had always been a strong suit of his. Not only did he assume that she was fully aware of it, but that she actually enjoyed the onlooker’s attention. Sometimes it was hard not to laugh at his silly accusations.

Rather than lose his mind at the creeping peeper (who quickly made himself scarce), he showed his displeasure by pulling her from the water by the arm and handling her warm, water softened body with cool, rough hands. They always knew the right places to touch to make her bend and break.

It took no time at all to make Vala into a whining, wanton creature. But before her tightening desires could be fulfilled, he stopped. Zeref removed his hands from thighs and lips from her stomach, leaving her there on the rocky edge of the water to catch her breath as he walked off. Quivering with want and need, Vala followed him, forgetting about her clothes entirely. No one ever said Vala was good at overlooking her more debauchee needs.

She only realized that he was angry once he turned to look at her over his shoulder, running a primal gaze over her every curve.

There should never have been a doubt in his mind that she belonged to him. With his hands knotting his white wrap over her body, she couldn't help but think he didn't trust her.

"Of course I'm yours." She affirmed, legs becoming gelatinous beneath her. His hand was still twisted in her hair, pulling her head back. Eyes closed, chest rising and falling heavily. That hot sensation between her thighs was only burning hotter as time slowly passed. The tips of his fingers found her thigh, lightly brushing his nails upward, dragging the fabric along with them. The ticklish sensation tightened her insides.

Vala didn't mind this form of reprimand.

Adventurous fingertips gently touched the sensitive spot between her thighs, skimming past only to flatten against her lower belly. His teasing was relentless. His breath against her ear was taunting, black eyes turned to the side to take in the rapturous expressions on her face. He was looking to see how long it would take for her to whimper with quavering need. Or, how long it took for her to try and turn the tables.

Today Vala was feeling a bit more submissive than usual. She let him touch and caress every inch of overly sensitized flesh until his hand unfurled from her damp hair. That was when she finally kissed him, taking two curled fingertips below his chin, pulling him close with asking eyes. Black lashes shaded dark eyes as her lips drew closer; his own fingertips tilted the edge of her jaw until their lips met.

Magic. Just as she had always tasted on his lips. Or was it lightning? The taste of summer rain with a gentle sillage of ozone entered her mouth as the very top of his tongue met hers. His kiss felt like an unnecessary apology for keeping her in wait.

Before she knew it, her back was pressed roughly against a nearby tree with both legs hooked around his hips. Larger hands latched onto her upper thighs near the meat of her butt, fingers curled close to her center. Her own hands were twisted into his hair, one elbow hooked around his arm and over his ear. The other curled around his neck, her hand flat against his head, pulling him deeper into their kiss.

It was rare for Zeref to be anything less than genial. Seeing other men eying up what’s his always did this to him. He desired total control over Vala and the people who were allowed to see her. A small thrust ground her back against the tree’s bark. Vala always loved to see the marks he would leave on her body; at the very least he liked to make them interesting to look at. Her kiss-swollen lips pulled from his and pressed back to the hard surface behind her, catching a few damp strands of hair.

One of her hands fell from his hair and snaked down his chest to his newly exposed stomach until his erection was in her hand. For whatever reason, it made his face heat up. Every damn time. No matter how many times she touched him or took him or, his face grew hotter, sucked him, he always grew modest at her touch. Hot kisses trailed across his shoulder to his chest. She pressed the tip of him to her stomach, implying exactly what she wanted.

She didn’t push his clothes away entirely, nor did he pull the wrap fully from her shoulders. Rather, she liked the dark contrast of his almost monk-like robe and their movements against each other. It made their love affair seem more dangerous than it really was.

Two fingers worked to make her cry with pleasure as they entered her, curling up and pressing deep. Her own hand stilled, only running her thumb against that sensitive nerves behind the head. As much as they both wanted to keep this going, Vala was sure she would finish before he even entered her if this continued.

There was nothing gentle about the way he forced himself into her, sending her screams to the heavens. But that was only the first stroke.

He tore the cloth from her body and dropped her legs, turning her away until her chest was flush against the tree bark. Her hands fell uselessly against the tree, nails digging in as she squealed and mewled with pleasure. This position hit a particular spot within her that made her totally malleable. Using a knee to separate her legs a bit further, he snaked one arm between her body and the bark to grip one breast tightly and slid the other hand between her legs to that little bundle of nerves.

Unable to withhold even her most wild screams, Vala bent to his will as nimble fingers stroked her, rubbing quickly as he thrusted more and more deeply. And erratically. As sharp teeth bit into the top of her shoulder, he rolled her nipple under his thumb, and Zeref fucked her hard.

Vala was hesitant to think of such a word when they made love, but this was something primal and needy. They were fucking. Or more accurately, he was fucking her into oblivion. She could barely breathe to keep up with her own screams. The area where he entered was slick with mixed fluids that dripped to the dirt.

He suddenly hoisted one of her legs up and held her against his chest, slowing his pace, but making the rhythm deeper and more forceful. Low moans fell from the hollow of her throat that made Zeref nearly release. She was almost there, The hand that toyed with her breast took her hand and pressed it to the place where their bodies joined. A gasp shot from her chest at the suggestion, but he was not taking no for an answer. He took her fingers and slid them against her own exposed sex. When that didn’t make her cry with pleasure, he slid her index finger into her own tightness, joining his erection. That’s when he felt it start to close around him.

_Boom_! Fireworks and twisting, coiling pleasure lit up her eyes as she came around him. She didn’t realize she had screamed his name until she heard herself chanting it in a high pitch as he positioned her again like a toy. He pressed her legs together and gently held her throat as he pumped into her relentlessly to find his own release. A grunting gasp came as he shot pulses of warm fluid into her womb. Each pulse brought him further back to earth, releasing the tight hold he had on her hips, sliding his hand to her chest to feel her thumping heartbeat. Vala felt him smile against the back of her shoulder as he kissed the spot he was biting just a moment before. He twitched just a few more times, causing Vala to tighten around him again.

She would never get bored of Zeref. He was endlessly interesting. She had heard ladies of the court complain about their husbands’ intimacy. That was a concept Vala simply couldn’t wrap her mind around. She always wanted Zeref and he always wanted her, though he was usually far more restrained that she was.

Later that night Zeref tried to apologize for being so rough with her, face red and nervous as he spoke. Vala just smiled and admired the red rub marks on her chest before dropping a kiss on his nose, reminding him for the twentieth time that night that she loved his wild side.


	10. Who is Vee?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yay! The last one. Sorry that this took so long. I had my son and moved and just craziness got in the way. Anyhoo, here it is. I hope you all enjoy it. I decided I couldn't go with a tragic ending, so here's my sweet little fluffy ending to this little tale.

When they finally found it they were disappointed. It was a very old church in the middle of some wasteland of burned trees and crumbled rock. Inside it was just as desolate with only one item that stood out among the wreckage. A white crushed silk wedding album. Or, at least that’s what Lucy thought at first. Natsu picked it up and weighed it in his hand and Lucy pretended not to admire the firm focus in his expression. He hadn’t told her what this book was, only that it was important to destroy it. Now, seeing its beautifully crafted cover, Lucy was having second thoughts. Maybe Natsu didn’t see something romantic when he looked at it, but Lucy knew a heartfelt gesture when she saw one. 

“You’re just going to burn it?” She asked, concern flowing through her voice.

Natsu just stared at the thing in the middle of the room with a small frown. He seemed to be having second thoughts. It had been a long trip; they were on some small, vacant continent on the opposite side of the world. There were no other people even though there were abandoned castles and marketplaces scattered everywhere.

He lit up one hand with a scowl.

“ _Don’t_ -!”

Natsu stumbled from the impact when Lucy tackled him, but managed to hold the book out of her reach. “What the Hell Luce?!” 

“You can’t destroy that!”

“Why not?!”

“It’s too precious!”

“What are you talkin’ about!?”

Lucy hopped and managed to swipe it from his grasp but Happy then grabbed it from above. The Exceed went to stick his tongue out at her when a rock hit him in the face, causing him to drop the album on the ground. He held his nose tightly and glared at her with tears in his eyes, “Hey!”

Natsu held Lucy’s arms behind her back as she thrashed. Then a light flashed over the room and their fighting stopped. They just stared, mouths hanging open.

…

 

Darkness welcomed her. Cloaking her body like a warm blanket in the bleak, frigid winter, slowly easing the chill from her bones. Shadows weighed gently over her body as warm bath water. Movement was overrated, she could stay here forever in the comforting embrace of this black abyss.  
  
It was death. It had to be. What else could possibly be this quiet and comfortable? It was like sleeping, yet somehow it felt more permanent. Dreams came and passed, floating like clouds through her mind. Time was irrelevant here. The only thing that mattered was the pure, soft silence.  
  
That is, until she heard some sourceless sound. Quiet were the voices at first, but soon they blossomed into a cacophony. Surrounding her, dragging her from that comfortable silence she knew so well.  
  
That well known darkness soon made way for something new and sharp. Black nothingness quickly gave way as yellow light faded around her, shaping her, swirling and spinning like screaming lightning.  
  
Confusion and dissatisfaction was plain on her face as two figures made themselves known in the overwhelming light that whirled around her in the shape of an orb. One dumbfounded face was wide eyed, mouth open, the other held a few fingers to parted lips.  
  
The gentle weight of wind gave way to a heavy gravity that wanted to pull her to the ground. It felt like waking from a wonderful dream she couldn't remember. Vala crumpled to the ground as soon as her legs materialized.  
  
Reality was harsh. And bitter cold.  
  
Three sets of wide eyes stared from above, but Vala was too busy coming to terms with what had just happened to acknowledge them.  
  
Of all the things the trio expected, this wasn't one of them. /they figured it was another demon of Zeref’s book that he didn’t want unleashed. At least that’s what they suspected.  


Well, until the book exploded.  
  
The auburn hired girl was in a clump on the floor, staring blankly at the mossy, crackled white marble floor.  
  
Her fingertips touched the gravelly marble. It was incredibly old, degraded over hundreds and hundreds of years of weather and wear. There was a familiar sense to everything around her, especially the chill in the air. She lifted her head slowly but an open wall that was once a windowsill caught her eye. It was massive and wide. There were fallen stones scattered across the marble where there was once an arch forming the top of the opening. Now it was free, the pitched roof was even gone. It was broken, dotting the ground with massive, horse sized slabs all around. It had caved in, or, according the slight charring, it was bombed with fire and oil. It was amazing that the old structure stood at all.

A memory floated past her eyes, a young man who caused endless desolation wherever he stepped. The contradiction of his gentle persona paired with such a horrible curse was what drew her to him. Her hand lifted from the marble to touch her lips to draw out the memory of a soft kiss. The sensation made her heart squirm delightfully.  
  
Foreign thoughts were finding their way back to her as she sat there listening to an echo of a memory. A memory of a young man who couldn't die using magic to seal her dying body away. It was vague, but it was there. Nervous and timid, Vala looked to her hands, hoping to every deity that they weren't wrinkled and gray.  
  
Breath caught in her throat as smooth cream skin appeared on her hands. What a beautiful, relieving sight. Unsure of her plight, or who these people were, she finally addressed the couple standing above her with a weak smile.  
  
"I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was having company." Her muscles were atrophied so badly she couldn't stop shaking. Even gravity itself was too heavy. She shakily pushed herself to a seated position, one palm pressed to the side of her aching head, the other propped her up against the floor. A grey eye remained open, but squinted to look at her new friends in her natural language, "Had I known I would have made tea."  


Lucy’s mouth fell open. What the hell was happening right now?! This girl flies out of a book speaking a dead language? That is some serious bedtime story content right there. All joking aside, Lucy was confused. The tattered white book was mere confetti under the girl’s body. The blonde mage never thought much of Zeref. Yes, he was Natsu's older brother from another time. Yes, Natsu took it upon himself to run this wayward errand for him. But she never expected him to be a _romantic_. The careful way he put that book away, made from delicate cotton spun paper and silk.

That’s what made her try to take it from Natsu. Something wasn’t right about destroying something so carefully created and it was better to leave the thing intact. At least until they could figure out what it was.

They got their answer the second it hit the ground.

It lit up and flipped its own pages, exploding with bright yellow light as a girl her own age suddenly materialized under the glow. Something about this wasn't adding up. If Zeref had sealed his lover away in one of his books, why wasn't she a monster like his other demons? Why wasn't she just old bones?

Lucy and Natsu exchanged the same baffled look. Didn't he love her? Why would he want her vessel destroyed?   
  
The silver eyed girl glanced to each party, thinking she had lost her marbles when her eyes rested above the pink haired man's shoulder to something floating there.  
  
A flying... blue.... cat? What in the world? And a man with pink hair and flames surrounding one hand? The beautiful blonde to his side was looking at Vala with curiosity. There was only one way to solve this mystery, but she was just simply too tired to make any sense of it. Her eyes were growing heavy, her body was shivering cold.  


Natsu took a step toward Vala and shouted something in his own language. She could understand it, but it wasn’t her native tongue so it took a few moments to decipher his shout of, “Who are you?!”

Lucy looked to Vala on the ground then asked Natsu something quietly. They were speaking Japanese. And that man had two pointed canines.  
  
A skull cracking headache forced Vala’s eyes shut.  
  
Pointed canines. Cowlicked black hair. Gentle eyes and blood red anger. Love; sweet, sweet love. Rough handwriting and embarrassing sketches.  
  
Random thoughts pierced her mind, tingling like a waking limb. Hands flew to her head, pushing tightly to contain the invading feeling of those unidentifiable memories. One thing finally began to take form, importantly. A feeling of sickness and motion. The feeling of being crushed against a wall, and blood. Lots of blood, and burning hot tears on her cold skin. Back then his skin felt hot on hers as she felt herself beginning to die. Everything faded until only a pinhole of life remained, holding her to this world.  
  
And then that's where she remained, gripping onto that thread. It felt like that warm tingle of magic when she first reached it, but somehow stronger. She could feel him doing things around her body. She could sense his presence and the muffled sound of a raw voice. And then that pure, caressing darkness.  
  
_Zeref_.  
  
Then more motion happened, and more Japanese. A set of arms wrapped around her, the pink haired man picked her up and started speaking to his blonde girlfriend. Vala couldn't exactly understand what they were saying through the fogging headache and tingling memories. All she could think about was that black mage. _I wonder if he ever learned out how to die…_  
  
Her mouth was very dry, her lips cracked. She was wrapped in blankets and plopped on a bed of some sort. It was all so vague and distant as her mind pieced her memories back together.  
  
Days came and passed before her mind was clear again. She had to process what happened to her, and by that time they were on the road to their home- Fairy Tail Guild.  
  
"How did you find me?" Vala asked in the dark of night as he sat watching the campfire with a solemn expression. "I was in some strange book in an old, decimated church continents away." He didn't look up to answer. He just watched the fire sullenly. Her heart felt tight in her chest as another theory formed, "Is Zeref dead?" Her voice came out sounding so much more broken than she expected. Losing him forever was a concept she had a very difficult time grasping. He was the only thing she knew anymore. So much time had come and passed while she was sealed away that she didn’t know anything anymore. Even her language was long gone, her people were wiped out around 300 years ago by a poorly recorded genocide. There was not one person who carried on her culture or history, no one except for her.   
  
Natsu’s big eyes lifted. He seemed to be trying to figure her out, like a puzzle. Then, after a little bit, "Nah, he's not dead. Still wishes he was though. He did a lot of bad stuff, he hurt a lot of people and tried to end the world."  
  
Vala went still, watching his expression for any hint of a joke. If it was, it wasn’t very funny.  
  
Natsu frowned a little, "For some reason I hoped you were a bad person, like you forced him to do all that. But you're just normal. Weirdly normal.” His brow creased slightly, “I’ve been hoping for someone else to blame ever since I found out he's my brother."  
  
Her throat felt like it had cold steel thrust into her thyroid and a flutter of anxiety thrilled through her blood, "Y-you're..." She stuttered then leaned forward onto her hands to look at him with intensity as old theories and notes sprung back to life. "Natsu, you're not supposed to be alive. What did he do? How is this possible?" Her eyes clouded over in thought as she tried to recollect everything Zeref had ever told her about reanimation of the dead. "This can't be real, I must be in Hell."  
  
"From where you're sitting I can see why it might feel like it."

Then, her hand reached to her belly and sat back on her heels, eyes absent. "I never got to tell him." Vala's voice cracked as warm tears filled her eyes, "I never told him." A fat tear rolled over the round of her freckled cheek. What kind of horrible person doesn’t tell their lover that they’re pregnant? What kind of awful person was she that she kept it from him for _months_. The awful kind of person who doesn’t trust their lover. She was to blame for all that happened. If she had just told him then maybe their baby would be alive. Maybe then she wouldn’t have been sealed away in that book.   
  
Natsu stood and plopped himself down next to her and put an arm around her shoulder, staring at the fire. "He knows about the…” He didn’t know how to refer to it. Baby? Fetus? Nephew? Neice? It was just a weird topic. “I think it's a big reason why he went crazy at first. He figured if he had never met you you would have lived and died and been peaceful.” Vala went to talk over him but he cut her off, “But you know what wouldn't have happened. You guys were gonna meet no matter what, but apparently you weren't meant to die." He paused, thinking for a second on how to say it, "I'm sorry about your loss." A deep frown appeared in his lips, he was sincerely sorry.

  
Vala felt that hollow feeling in her heart begin to fill up again. Just hearing another person acknowledge her sorrow seemed to take some of the burden. She pulled at the hem of the dress Lucy let her borrow. It was far smaller than she was comfortable with. Ahh, how the times had changed.

"Will I be allowed to see him when we get there?" She asked quietly.  
  
Natsu swallowed hard, "Erm, I don't know. But I'll do everything I can to make it happen. All Zeref wanted was to be normal and to live and die like everyone else. Maybe if he sees you he can stop hating everything so much and let himself just... Die, I guess."  


When Vala knew Zeref he didn't necessarily hate anything, just himself. He suffered with severe depression, but he never externalized it if he could help it. She wondered if seeing him would make it better or worse. It could go either way. He was prone to experiencing very mixed emotions.  
  
Eventually the four of them made it to the guild. Time came and went and soon a month had passed. Vala was working with historians and apprenticing under them, knowing she would have to live on her own eventually. They had so many questions about her culture and she translated a few Japanese books into English. Every day Natsu helped her reach her magic. She learned more and more about her capabilities and why it was important to leave them untouched as much as possible. Zeref was right from the start. If she played with her magic, it would cease to defend her. Though, it could be pushed onto other people if she needed to. She could guard up to three other people from any kind of magic. It simply wouldn’t have any effect of anyone under her protection.

Lucy, Natsu’s roommate (and future sister-in-law- _ish_ ) was the best at teaching her about the new world. Arranged marriages were outlawed for the most part. But more importantly, she could wear _pants_! Woo!

“I just need a minute.” Vala panted as she trailed far behind her friends, hands on her knees.

“Hurry up or we’re going to be late!” Lucy called back at her. Vala rolled her eyes and dropped her head to try and even out her breathing. When she opened her eyes she saw her favorite couple standing behind her with their little red headed daughter strapped to her daddy’s chest.

Erza looked her up and down with a strange expression then shared a secretive glance with Jellal.

With a deep breath, Vala threw herself back into a walking pace to catch up. But Erza’s heavy hand dropped over her shoulder, “Oh no you don’t. We are taking a detour.” 

Vala looked from Erza, to Jellal, to their daughter, Rose. Jellal was a very quiet guy, but his love for his wife was incredibly fierce. Vala had come to refer to them as the Ultimate Power Couple. Erza obviously loved the nickname.

“Where are we going?” She finally managed to ask after a fifteen minutes of silent hiking.

“We’re taking you to the hospital. 

Vala spun on her heel and started walking the other way, but Erza grabbed the back of her collar. The princess glared at her friend, “I’m not going. I refuse.”

“Vala, you’ve been here for a month and you still haven’t seen a doctor.” Jellal said with reproach.

“I don’t need one—“

“Yes. Yes you do, now either we can do this the nice way, or we can do this the hard way.” Erza always had such a sweet, convincing tone about her. Vala couldn’t help the nervous thrill ringing through her belly as she imagined what the ‘hard way’ entailed.

Vala was very close with Erza, they had more in common than they liked to admit. It was never outright stated that they both loved criminals, but it was silently understood. Jellal lived with her now; they were married shortly after Zeref’s war. Vala couldn’t help internally kicking herself ever time she heard the war referred to as such.

No one arrive back to the guild from their beach trip until the following day. Vala waited impatiently at Erza’s place.

  
"Do you think I'll be allowed to see him, you know, considering the circumstances?" Vala asked, biting her lip, baby Rose asleep in her arms with a toothless open mouth. The baby loved Vala's old-world songs in her lost language, something about the tunes made her go to sleep. Or perhaps it was the tone of her voice. Either way, Jellal had, more than once, frantically brought a screaming Rose to Lucy's apartment at night for Vala to soothe her to sleep with a softly sung song. Vala had an insane amount of pride in her newfound baby-soothing superpower.  
  
Erza was arranging her armor on a stand while Vala balanced Rose on her knees. She was enjoying a spot of sunlight in Erza's deep windowsill, observing her friend’s frantic cleaning session. If she didn’t know better, she would accuse Erza of nesting. A secretive smile came over her amused expression.  
  
The redhead didn't even turn to look as she spoke, as if her words were a given, "I'm sure they'll make an exception for someone brave enough to bear Zeref’s child." There was a smile on her voice that Vala didn’t return. She was still shocked by the news that she was still somehow still pregnant. About 5 “months” according to the ultrasound. The princess looked to Erza with weak resolve. She wasn’t even sure if this was something she wanted anymore. The world was different now, and Zeref was…

Vala frowned. No matter how awful thing had turned out, she had to remain positive. If anyone could get permission for her to speak with Zeref, it was Erza.  
  
Rose hummed a gummy hum in her sleep and Vala felt her heart strain. She had had an interesting few weeks ahead of her. Between telling Natsu and the rest of the guild what was going on, she also needed to get the rest of her life in order within the next four months. As of yesterday she was 26 weeks pregnant with a little boy, or so the doctor suspected. If only she could explain to him that she was far, **far** , FAR past the prescribed 40 weeks gestation.  


She had only ever been with one man, so there was no question of who his father was. It was more a question of _how_ this happened and why they were both able to survive Zeref’s death predation. The more she learned about her hidden magic, the more she wished she had just listened to Zeref’s warnings to begin with.

 _Damn curiosity!_   
  
It didn't help that Erza bugged her every day about contacting Zeref. The renowned swordsman hated Zeref more than any other living person, but she still requested that Vala tell him she was alive and well via letter. She thought it was dishonest to leave it open ended until now. But Vala held all of the power in their relationship. She could easily move about her life without ever telling Zeref she lived or that they were parents. But, to be a decent person she would have to tell him eventually, just not quite yet. It was frightening to know that her body was cultivating a killer’s child. She wasn’t sure she could handle the abuse she would endure if her baby’s parentage was revealed. That was why she planned to talk to Lucy first, before telling Natsu.

He’d be so excited, she knew, so he would have a hard time keeping his mouth shut about it. Lucy on the other hand would be able to look at it all a little more pragmatically.   
  
As she gained more control and comprehension of her magic, the better grasp she understood why she was alive, why her baby survived, and why she wasn't aging anymore. It must have been a natural reaction when Zeref killed those Knights. She pushed that shield around the baby. But the shield was too small and it caused her placenta to partially abrupt, which is what nearly killed them both. The blood loss was ultimately what nearly ended her life, not Zeref. Once the waves of death ended, her shield reinstated and began healing her body rapidly, including the connection between her and her child. The doctor had seen the scar and clots on her placenta; he told her they were both lucky to be alive. She was reminded again and again how resilient a human body could be.   
  
Zeref hadn’t seen any of that happening, and with the massive hemorrhaging and silent pulse, he assumed Vala was dead and sealed her body away. She figured he sealed her away in case he finally learned how to reanimate the dead, like he had wanted for Natsu. But perhaps decided against it last minute, considering how badly that all turned out.

  
Soft cooing noises came from the pudgy little baby in her arms as Rose began to wake. Her father had just walked in and, seeing his little angel awake, he scooped her up with a giant loving grin. Rose squealed happily.

Vala watched with a brittle smile.

She was alone in all of this.

No, that was an exaggeration.

Lucy, Natsu, Erza, Jellal, and the rest of Fairy Tail would never make her go through this alone. They had taken her in as their own, and they appreciated the hell out of her refusing to become a freeloader. Historians aren’t paid much, but at least it was something to help with bills.  
  
The following day was The Day. The Day when Natsu appeared in Lucy's living room with a signed laminated card. It was written exemption for permission to visit the most dangerous enemy the world had ever known. Her heart leapt to her throat as she cradled that card like a newborn kitten. Natsu ruffled her long hair causing it to static up. Vala glared playfully until it morphed into a broad toothy grin. After two months of nail biting and waiting, her reunion with Zeref was finally pushed into motion. Thank the God her belly wasn’t showing yet.  


...

  
Months passed in silence. Zeref had a feeling Natsu was not planning to come back, and he couldn't blame him for feeling that way. It was only natural. But then came a heavy knock to his metal door to break his concentration.  
  
Light suddenly filled the white room, temporarily blinding Zeref. With one eye open, he managed to catch a glimpse of his visitor. Pink hair and a slight scowl. Natsu was suddenly standing before Zeref who still had his eyes shut to adjust to the light. Natsu pressed his lips to the side and folded his arms over his chest, thinking hard on something.  
  
"Can I tell you something?" He started to say, but quickly backed off. Zeref squinted his eyes to try and see in the bright light. At the sight of his little brother's distressed face he pressed his brows together.  
  
A slight blush faded across the twenty-something looking young man's cheeks. He scratched the back of his head and looked to the ceiling, "Er, I, uh..." He sighed and sunk to sit before Zeref, deflating. "I'm in love with someone, I think, and that story you told me... It kinda freaked me out."  
  
"I am the exception, not the rule." He started to say. "Loving someone is an incredible feeling. Don't let it go just because I am a monster."  
  
An iconic grin stretched across Natsu's face, baring pointed canines. "Can I tell you a secret?" Zeref raised a thin brow and Natsu's grin grew, "I'm going to ask her to marry me. Erza said that I have to anyway because we've been living in sin or something..." He rambled on for a little while and a satisfied smile found a home on Zeref's face. Even after knowing everything there was to know, Natsu was still the happy go lucky person he always was, even before the devil himself.  
  
"Oh!" Natsu hit his fist his open palm. "I almost forgot! There's another secret!" He grinned brightly and reached his hand to Zeref's inner arm, releasing one of the many metal shackles with a key. "I have to show you something, but don't freak out or I won't be able to get you out of here again."  
  
Zeref was confused. Natsu was gone for several months, presumably trying to comprehend exactly what he had admitted. Why was he so incredibly happy to see him? So much so that he was trying to get him out of his cell. Zeref couldn’t help the suspicion that rose.  
  
"I appreciate the offer, Natsu. But I am here to repent." Zeref stood, hoisted up by his brother, standing for the first time in months. "Allowing me the right to leave won’t help me do that."  
  
"Yeah, maybe it won't help you feel like shit about everything." Natsu rolled his eyes, "or it might make you feel even worse. And in your screwed up head _that_ might make you feel better."  
  
The chains around his wrists and ankles remained in place when Natsu lead him away. Natural sunlight was incredibly bright after years of confinement. People walking down the halls were bowing around them like they were in their own private bubble. The only one to come near them was a pretty blonde who came and whispered something in Natsu's ear, glancing over to Zeref. He knew Lucy had to be saying something about him, but it wasn't the first or last time someone would speak ill of him. But, to his immense surprise, she smiled up at him and ran ahead, a rolled whip bouncing off of her hip with every step.  
  
She ran ahead to open a door, which then lead to a small colonnade. There were walkways that went in four different directions with a burbling fountain in the middle.

  
"I found her, that girl you were telling me about." Natsu started to say. Zeref's heart collapsed. "She's pretty cool, but-"  
  
"Natsu, please don't do this." Zeref cut him off, knowing Natsu had to be mistaken. "I'm trying to live out the rest of my days in suffering. I deserve none of your pity."  


A door behind them opened and slammed with a high powered lock shifting into place. Natsu's grin deepened, becoming more sincere by the second. "Everyone should get a second chance."  


Quiet tapping slowly made its way across the garden and stopped right behind him. Natsu motioned for him to turn around with his finger and Zeref braced his heart for more pain. Instead of the bitter disappointment he expected, his throat caught with something akin to relief.  


She was swathed in a yellow dress that fell in undefined pleats to her knees and wove into lace up her neck and down her arms. She was looking at him with a mirror image of his own astonishment; eyes wide, mouth agape. A hand covered her trembling lips, silver eyes becoming pink as she held back tears.  
  
Natsu snuck out at some point and the guest wandered to the fountain’s edge to sit. She was nervously pulling at her dress’s lace sleeves, avoiding all eye contact, "That brother of yours is tenacious."

  
His voice was quiet as his eyes traveled all over her. He had no right to feel anything for Vala anymore. But that logic didn't stop his heart from squirming in his chest, "How is this possible?”

  
Vala sighed and her tough act fell as her lips trembled miserably in an attempt to respond. This encounter hurt her just as badly as it was hurting him. "You sealed me away just as I had learned to reach my bloodline’s magic, it healed me and removed my ability to age, just as you suspected it might."  
  
Just like the night she bled out in his arms Zeref's face crumpled and fell to his chest to hide the raw emotions from his lover. "Your heart, it stopped, how...?"  
  
Although she trembled, Vala finally scrounged up the courage to look at him. It helped that he was looking away from her. It gave her an opportunity to look him over without hitching a sob. He looked so tired with that same silly cowlick, but his clothing was much different. He looked very much the part of a prisoner in a white tank and long tan pants with tight stone shackles around his wrists and ankles. He peered at her from under his lashes and it took every ounce of energy in her body not to kiss him, that shy look of his always got her. Oh how she had missed this man.

  
"I'm not sure." She spoke with growing strength. "Natsu and Lucy argued over my book, the one you sent him there _to destroy_ ,” she shot a quick glare, “and when it was dropped to the ground I was somehow released." That was when she finally bristled. "Why did you want them to destroy it? It would have killed us!"  
  
"It's been centuries Vala." His words were terse through clamped teeth, “For all I knew you were rotted bones trapped on earth when you should have ascended centuries ago.”

He lingered on her wording, but decided to leave it for a future conversation… But what if this was his only opportunity to speak with her like this? Zeref lifted his eyes to look at her as she ran mindless fingers over her lace sleeves. None of this felt real. He wanted to touch her and know she wasn't an illusion.  
  
Vala managed some semblance of a smirk, "It took some time, but it turns out that I am a bit more resilient than you ever gave me credit for." She rocked forward with that amused smirk as if telling a secret. "I can be immortal if I want to be, and pass my gift if I deem it necessary. Magic does not affect me at all, not even Natsu’s fire. If I wanted, I could hold onto my gift, press it inward and live forever.”  
  
Zeref was intrigued by this, was that why she was unaffected by his magic? He heard her take a very deep breath to brace herself for something unpleasant. It was amazing the small things he remembered about her habits.  
  
"…Or, I could shelter the unborn baby inside of me, protecting it from your magic while I took the hit." A hapless smile formed, "and then I might have woken up a few hundred years later to learn that our cells froze when you sealed us away."  
  
Ice ran through his veins. Obviously the gods were never planning to forgive him for killing so many, but now he understood that they just plain hated him. There was no other explanation. It felt like he had just stuck a fork in an outlet. He couldn't move, he couldn't breathe, he could only stare at Vala's silver eyes. Why was she always so damn amused! Nothing about any of this was even remotely funny! A hot tear dropped from his eye, barely skimming the skin of his cheek before hitting the ground.  
  
"Don't look at me like that." Her words felt like a slap, folding her arms over her belly protectively. The motion brought him back 300 years when she told him she needed to protect someone from him. Now he knew the truth of that statement. Vala’s silver eyes were like a forged blade, "You used my memory as an excuse to kill and maim, you destroyed everything we dreamed of the entire time we knew each other." Her own angry tears began to form; "You ruined my homeland and killed them all without discretion! My entire culture is gone! There isn’t one other living person who speaks my native tongue. It was genocide! Zeref…” Her heart felt so tight in her chest looking at him. He didn’t look the part of a killer, he never did. It made it so much harder to be angry with him when she knew she had to be. She felt helpless. “What am I supposed to do with you?”  
  
"I love you." The words were like a tiger leaping from his mouth, he couldn't contain them if he wanted. They came so fast that even Vala looked shocked. He had never said those words out loud. He knew it was far too late for them to mean anything, but he needed to get them out. He wanted to say them each and every day. He shut his eyes when she stood up, waiting for her to hit him in some way, not that she ever had before. He simply felt he deserved to get hit for saying he loved her after ruining her life. Or maybe she would just walk away and go on living as if she had never known him. He couldn’t hold any of her choices against her from here on out. The heat of her breath warmed his lips. Zeref held his breath. He didn’t dare to hope.  
  
Silver eyes bore into his black eyes when they finally opened. "You're about four hundred years late for that, Z."  
  
His heart sunk once more, remembering her little nickname for him. After refusing to return those words as she died in his arms he had no right to her heart. He had never wanted to change history more than he did at that moment.  
  
She then poked the center of his chest hard enough to push him back a step, "You're also a bit of an idiot if you think I didn’t already know that." She smiled, incapacitating him. "It's amazing that you are dense enough not to know how desperately I love you. I always have, and always will." Her smirk became teasing and she rolled her eyes to the side, "Even against my better judgment."  
  
He didn't have time to come up with a cogent response before she grabbed his hand. "Do you want to feel him kick?" She placed it on her belly so he could feel the rolling, spastic motion that came from within. Zeref's heart jumped to his throat.

Vala went on and on as if everything was completely fine and normal, "…Natsu said he'll fight anyone who tries to say you can't see him after he's born. Obviously he'll have to be born in a hospital so you can't be there..."  
  
She chatted on about the restrictions of their future meetings. How Erza had pulled some strings so that he was allowed to see Vala in this greenhouse as long as they had a chaperone. Vala laughed at the thought of being chaperoned anywhere with Zeref, as if the very thought him as an enemy was humorous.   
  
"Natsu needs to knock Luce up so Vee can have a friend his own age. Erza has been nesting, so _that’s_ obviously happening soon."  
  
Zeref didn’t even question her name choice for their son even if it _was_ very strange. "Lucy? I actually thought he was pining for Lisanna all this time.” He felt the corner of his lip quirk up, “Is he always so fickle?"  
  
Vala waved her hand at him, "Nah, he's just a victim of the rumor mill. He's always had a thing for Lucy; he’s just a bonehead when it comes to girls."  
  
"Well, if you are hoping for a niece of nephew from my brother then you might not have much longer to wait. He's planning to propose." Zeref explained with a small, tentative smile. She grinned back. He then sighed, his happiness quickly faded, "I'm so sorry this happened. I should never have dragged you into my world."  
  
Vala knew it was coming. It took a bit longer than she expected, but she knew her black mage was going to find some negative aspect of this outcome. She was pretty happy to be here in this day and age, even though it was difficult to comprehend.

She poignantly rolled her eyes at him with a smirk, "You _tried_ to keep me out of your world. You threatened to leave me in the middle of the woods where no one could hear me scream, remember?" She stifled a laugh and touched the side of his chin with her fingertips. His eyes grew wide. "You warned me time and time again that you would be the death of me, and you almost were. But something about you and me was meant to happen. Maybe if we had remained together then Natsu would never have existed. Maybe Fairy Tail wouldn't have existed. The dragons wouldn't have been released. It could have thrown history off balance." Her thumb traced along the edge of his jaw, blushing at her own admission. "I know you don't exactly believe in fate. It's not logical enough for you. But _I_ do." Vala grew a little shy. "I wish I could make you see that there is still beauty in the world. I wish you could see yourself the way I've always seen you."  
  
Zeref was briefly quiet to consider everything she said. Then,  
  
"Vala, I may not have been evil back then. But I am now. Do you even know what I’ve done?"  
  
Vala rocked back and folded her arms. "It doesn't matter what you were capable of anymore because you can’t use magic." Vala pointed out with a small frown, she was intense and dismissive with a waving hand. "Now stop doing that, you're making this so much harder than it needs to be."  
  
Zeref pried his eyes away from her and stared at the ground by her feet. "I can't forgive myself. I used your death as an excuse. And Mavis—"  


Silver eyes went sharp, " _Who_?"  
  
"Uh, well I, um..." Zeref sputtered, cleared his throat and swallowed. His face was beet red. His stalling only made Vala appear more upset as he hurried an explanation, "After you had been sealed away for a few centuries I truly lost myself to the loneliness. I latched onto the first person I was able to grow close with. She founded Fairy Tail, and I killed her."  
  
The corner of Vala's lip twitched a little, "and that's all?"  
  
"No," he admitted, shoulders sloping. Vala wasn't a jealous person before, he wondered if she would be angry with him. "I kissed her and she died instantly."  
  
The auburn haired girl’s eyes widened, "Wow, I'm so sorry you went through that. It must have been incredibly difficult to get past."  
  
He was quiet again. Vala placed a hand on his shoulder and he flinched at the contact. The touch seemed to break him from his thoughts, "I used _her_ death as another excuse to kill and maim."

Now she felt bad. Vala knew about Mavis, it was just fun to push his buttons. Especially when he thought she was angry with him. Oh, but his face was _so_ funny when he scrambled for an excuse. But she felt so, _so_ mean.

  
"I know killing and maiming isn't the only thing you do." Her heather grey eyes slunk over his frame with a suggestive little smile. "I know you can tie a mean double Windsor and you have an incredible knack for teaching. Maybe I can get you to write a book or something. Be a good citizen for once instead of the kind of guy who kidnaps princesses and makes dragons.”

A smile curved the corners of his lips and his black eyes brightened, “I don’t know if I can help myself. The last time I stole a princess it worked out so nicely for me.”

  
It was Vala’s turn to blush. She ran her hands over her belly and shifted nervously. “I’m happy you’re still alive, Zeref. I was afraid you’d died and I’d be alone for all of eternity.”

She didn’t have the wherewithal to stop him when his hands collected her face between them. Her heart quavered when his lips softly crushed hers, “I’ll never leave you alone if you’ll let me.”

 ...

“ _LUCY_!”

“WHAT?!”

“ _NASHI IS WALKING!!”_

Lucy ran into the other room to catch Natsu on the floor with their son with a massive grin on his face. His fingers were being grappled by their one year old who had a matching grin to his father. Lucy leaned against the doorway with a smile.

A knock came to the door around noon, the auburn girl on the other side of the door rocked on her heels while waiting and humming.

“Hey Vala, what’s up?” Natsu looked around her silhouette with a disappointed scowl, “Where’s my nephew?”

“Lisanna and Bixlow have him for an hour. I wanted to see if you guys could come with me to visit Zeref…?”

“Nashi just took his first steps so I don’t think Luc-“

“We’ll be right there! You go ahead and we’ll catch up in a little bit.” Lucy cut in, carrying their curious little boy on her hip. He reached out little hands to his aunt who tickled his foot with a smile as the boy squealed happily.

Vala always admired Lucy and Natsu since the moment she met them. They had a very special kind of love; you could see how much fun they had together. With a smile and a promise, Vala got on her way.

Tenrou Island was pretty far from banishment, but it was a safe place for Zeref to live away from the rest of the world. It had taken 5 years to convince Erza to let him live out his days there, but Vala could be _very_ convincing. Or, at least Rose was. That little girl had the hugest crush on Vee and it worked to Vala’s advantage more often than not.

Zeref tended to stay somewhat near the dock in case his wife and child decided to stop by. His eyes would light up and his entire demeanor would change at the sight of his little boy.

Vee loved to play with his little cousin, even though, in his own words, the infant was “bo-ring!”

Zeref was far too paranoid to try and have any more children, but Vala was wearing him down. That tenacity was the reason he fell in love with her to begin with, but he was terrified something might go wrong. He loved Vee more than he could express, but he couldn’t imagine life without Vala. Not again.

With a bright grin, Zeref collected his wife from the boat into a lifted hug. She giggled and kissed his face. Natsu rolled his eyes behind them with Nashi on his shoulders, Lucy trailed behind with about a thousand pounds of baby supplies.

Their family was strange, but they’d made it through every rough shore imaginable. They’d survived death, and they’d survived wars. They’d been forgiving, and they’d been hateful. But at the end of the day, Zeref was able to look at Vala and tell her he loved her, that she was his salvation, and that he’d never let anything separate them again. Not for all eternity.

 


End file.
